IMF Chief fights sex allegations
Phelps: Charges “baseless”

Jim Phelps, the longtime head of the Impossible Missions Force, is now faced with an impossible mission of his own-fighting off charges of sexual misconduct made by an ex-employee.

The woman, identified as former IMF Agent Cinnamon Carter, has alleged that Phelps gave her several choice assignments in exchange for sexual favors. Phelps emphatically denies her claims.

“Cinnamon’s charges are...

I thought my Trib headlines about Barack Obama were gone after Politically Incorrect got revamped. They aren't, so here we go:

This first one was written the night Obama was elected. I felt that the joke was a bit stale, but I wrote it anyway.

Damn! I was thinking along the same lines. I don't know if the joke works because the Trib endorsed Obama, but in Dan McGrath's sports section today we might see something like this:

White Sox fan elected President...

These headlines were inspired by the book "Our Dumb Century" by the writers of the Onion. They took historic headlines and put a comic twist on them. I started to think "what kind of headlines would we have seen if the Tribune owned the Cubs in 1901? I went to work. Funny, though-I could not come up with a good headline for 1906 (Sox beat Cubs in World Series) or 1919-20 (Black Sox Scandal). Those two events alone are ripe for comedy.

Anyway, I came up with these, along...

Parque, Schoenweis named in Mitchell Report
Both were teammates of members of 2005 White Sox

McGrath: "Championship" tainted forever

Sullivan: Parque and Schoenweis' 10 worst moments with players who went on to play for 2005 White Sox

"I knew my boys would be on the list! They didn't let me down!" -William Ligue, Convicted Felon and World's Number 1 White Sox Fan

Trib Editorial: Steroid Scandal worst since Black Sox....

Last week:

SLAMMIN' SAMMY HITS 600!
Former Cub legend hits milestone home run, cementing a legacy he dearly wanted to leave. Hall of Fame next?

Sullivan: Put him in now, stupid people. Sammy is a Cubbie icon

Rogers: Poor Sammy. He left his last Cub game early because he was mad at Dusty. Who could blame him?

A look back at all of Slammin' Sammy's greatest hits


This week:


Thomas hits 500...