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In honor of actor Andy Garcia and his (unintentionally) hilarious reaction to Sofia (Mary Corleone) Coppola's death scene in "The Godfather, Part III."
Newspaper headlines parody headlines written in past threads
Old

Sneering Chicago Sports Media Ass-Greatest Hits

Posted 05-04-2014 at 04:21 PM by TommyJohn (No!!Mary!!!)
Updated 06-20-2018 at 09:05 PM by TommyJohn

Way back in the olden days of 2003, I created a WSI habitue known as the Sneering Chicago Sports Media Ass. The SCSMA would show up from time to time to sneer at White Sox fans about how lousy, horrible and unloved their team was, as compared to the great franchise up north that hadn't won anything in going on 95 years.

The inspiration for this character was twofold-the first was Steve Rosenbloom, the normally cynical grouch who has written sports columns for both papers in town,...
WSI Church Elder
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Old

Trib celebrates their favorite White Sox moment

Posted 03-19-2014 at 10:17 PM by TommyJohn (No!!Mary!!!)
Updated 03-25-2014 at 07:00 AM by TommyJohn

September, 2012 was a month most Sox fans would love to forget. For the 10th anniversary of you-know-who, Yahoo.com posted an article "commemorating" the moment. I imagined how another news source might note it:

The "Cubune" weighs in

*10th Anniversary Commemorative Edition*



The Trib Celebrates the Greatest Moment in White Sox History

75-page pullout section

Pictures of attack from every angle...
WSI Church Elder
Views 8809 Comments 0 TommyJohn is offline
Old

old "Cubune" headline

Posted 10-14-2013 at 10:08 PM by TommyJohn (No!!Mary!!!)

LaRussa's A Champ!
Former White Sox Manager beats former White Sox coach to win World Series; second to win in both leagues

20 Years after White Sox fired him, LaRussa again on top

How stupid does Jerry Reinsdorf feel now?

June 20, 1986-Where were you?

It was a day most White Sox fans would prefer
to forget, if only we'd let them. But we won't!
It was on that day that Ken "Squawk" Harrelson,
the most clueless executive
...
WSI Church Elder
Views 18054 Comments 0 TommyJohn is offline
Old

IMF is in the headlines

Posted 05-17-2011 at 03:27 PM by TommyJohn (No!!Mary!!!)
Updated 11-30-2014 at 10:57 AM by TommyJohn

IMF Chief fights sex allegations
Phelps: Charges “baseless”

Jim Phelps, the longtime head of the Impossible Missions Force, is now faced with an impossible mission of his own-fighting off charges of sexual misconduct made by an ex-employee.

The woman, identified as former IMF Agent Cinnamon Carter, has alleged that Phelps gave her several choice assignments in exchange for sexual favors. Phelps emphatically denies her claims.

“Cinnamon’s charges...
WSI Church Elder
Views 3105 Comments 0 TommyJohn is offline
Old

headlines from PI

Posted 12-05-2010 at 10:19 AM by TommyJohn (No!!Mary!!!)
Updated 05-29-2011 at 10:41 AM by TommyJohn

I thought my Trib headlines about Barack Obama were gone after Politically Incorrect got revamped. They aren't, so here we go:

This first one was written the night Obama was elected. I felt that the joke was a bit stale, but I wrote it anyway.

Damn! I was thinking along the same lines. I don't know if the joke works because the Trib endorsed Obama, but in Dan McGrath's sports section today we might see something like this:

White Sox fan elected President...
WSI Church Elder
Views 3016 Comments 0 TommyJohn is offline



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