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In honor of actor Andy Garcia and his (unintentionally) hilarious reaction to Sofia (Mary Corleone) Coppola's death scene in "The Godfather, Part III."
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headlines cont.

Posted 12-04-2010 at 11:33 AM by TommyJohn
Updated 05-29-2011 at 10:47 AM by TommyJohn


(Note: this was my 37th birthday and the day the Sox clinched the AL Central)


Oops! That was supposed to be Monday's headline!

Brought to you by the Dewey Defeats Truman committee.


Sox clinch

The last teams that we at the Tribune Company wanted to think about are
the 1927 Yankees, 1955 Dodgers, 1984 Tigers and 1990 Reds. Those are
the teams that went wire-to-wire and won the world series. We prefer
to think and write about the 1964 Phillies and the 1969 Cubs, who choked
away big leads.

Tomorrow: Special pullout section on wire-to-wire teams that did not make
it to world series.



Indians clinch Central! White Sox blow it! Biggest choke in baseball history complete!!

Complete coverage of historic collapse inside:
Phil Rogers: Biggest ever, 1964 Phillies don't compare

we get other perspectives:
Jim Bunning: Geez! We're amateurs compared to these guys!
Ralph Branca: Thanks for taking me off the hook, fellas!
Don Young: Me, too!
Ron Santo: Please elect me to the Hall of Fame? Pretty please?

Doris Kearns Goodwin: White Sox collapse "not poetic or prosaic enough" to merit writing about. "I'll stick with my gloriously suffering Red Sox. There is such beauty to the pain they inflicted on us all."

ESPN expert sez: blah blah blah blah blah Yankees Red Sox
yap yap yap yap Red Sox Yankees gab gab gab gab New
York Boston blah blah blah blah CHICAGO! biggest collapse
in baseball history!!!! blah blah blah blah Yankees Red Sox..


A message to our readers:

We here at the Tribune made a big mistake. We published a headline
and stories in Monday's paper for an event that actually didn't happen.

You see, we had the headline and stories ready and set to go for the
better part of a month and Dan McGrath was so excited when he saw
them that he ran them without our knowledge. Monday's front page
headline should have read:

Sox clinch wild card, will face Chicago in first round

The Tribune regrets the error


10/3/05: The day that the ALDS started in Chicago, the Tribune published a front-page story about how poor the surrounding neighborhood was and how the Sox didn't give back to the community. Oh, and also how the fumes of marijuana smoke could be smelled within the vicinity of U.S. Cellular Field.

White Sox fans high on team's success
"Aw, dude. They're like, totally awesome." says devoted Sox fan Craig Cannibis


Munchie outbreak at Cell
Vendors, concession stands report brisk mid-game sales of Doritos, Ding Dongs


10/7/05: The White Sox beat the Red Sox to win their first postseason series in 88 years.
No miracle comeback this year as Chicago takes series in three


10/13/05: the day after the famous AJ "dropped third strike" game, when bloggers and other dopes were hyperventilating about the Sox "stealing" a win from the Angels and causing "another Black Sox scandal." The fact that the game was tied at the time of the play was lost on just about all of them.

Chicago "Wins"

Angels robbed on blatant bad call, go up 2-0 (because they should've won)

"what was wrong with that call? It was perfect!"-Chicago 1st baseman Paul "Chick" Konerko

White Sox have cheated in postseason before
(yet another) look back at 1919

10/27/05: The day after the White Sox won their first World Series in 88 years, one of the greatest days in our lives as sports fans. And what did we hear? That the Sox still weren't as "popular" as the Cubs and that Chicago would always be a "Cub town."

Cub fan petitions MLB to change World Series rules; allow most popular teams in.

Chet Dipley is a Cub fan and the President of the University of Illinois
chapter of Phi Drunka Jerka. He feels MLB should change the rules and
allow the most popular teams to play in the World Series.

"we would play in it every year" said Dipley. "So why not? I mean, the
ratings were so low for the White Sox that the games shouldn't count.
I mean, the Cubbies are prom kings, class jocks and members of Phi
Drunka Jerka. That is, they don't get any cooler. The Sox are the class
nerd. Would you vote for the class nerd for prom king? Or admit him to
Phi Drunka Jerka? The Cubbies are way cool and way popular. They
should play in the Super Bowl every year."

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