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In honor of actor Andy Garcia and his (unintentionally) hilarious reaction to Sofia (Mary Corleone) Coppola's death scene in "The Godfather, Part III."
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A new curse! How cute!

Posted 10-29-2011 at 10:21 AM by TommyJohn

As posted in Talking Baseball:

Let's invent a curse! Texas hasn't won in 50 years and they were one strike away twice-will we now see poems, plays, and literary lights moaning and groaning about how woeful and awful and cursed they are, and how there is something glorious and noble in their suffering?

The Curse of JFK-As we know, President Kennedy threw out the first ball before the first game in Senators/Rangers history. He was gunned down on a Dallas street two years later-so Texas is being punished forever forever and forever for killing JFK. (I know the Dallas Cowboys have won plenty of times, but I'm busy feeling sorry for myself-don't bother me with facts!)

The Curse of Jeff Burroughs-He was one of the first stars of the Rangers, then he left for free agency. The team has never been the same since. Again, do not bother me with facts. I'm trying to make money here, peasants.

The Curse of Ten Cent Beer Night-The Rangers were the competition that night in Cleveland. They're being punished for contributing to, oh, I don't know.

The Curse of Ted Williams-He was the first manager of the Rangers in 1972 after they moved from D.C. He brought his Boston curse over with him. So Texas and Boston are blood brothers!

The Curz of Cruz-Nelson Cruz should have made that play in the 9th in Game 6. Lynch him! Run him out of town! Treat him like the pariah he is!

The Curse of Robin Ventura-You think it's played out, but I don't. Ventura got the knuckle noogies, then put the scamoodies (ancient Italian curse) on Ryan. And what number is David Freese? Number 23, of course. It's Karma, bitches!

Lastly,

The Curse of (Pull something out of your ass, like Dan Shaughnessy or Dave Condon, and watch it grow beyond anything you dreamed thanks to people looking for excuses).
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