PDA

View Full Version : A Wrigley Tale


Moses_Scurry
04-22-2002, 08:56 AM
This is a true story:

Friday afternoon when I got home from work, I decided to go for a little 4 mile run. I ran a route that took me by everyone's favorite tourist attraction: Wrigley Field. It was just after Friday's game against the Reds had ended so there were alot of drunks exiting the park and heading across the street. Well, nature called and I decided that I wouldn't be able to make it home in time, so I decided to stop at one of the few places in the city where you can go to the bathroom and not be a paying customer, the McDonalds across the street from Wrigley. As I approached the entrance, There were two drunken idiot cub fans that were about to engage in some fisticuffs right outside the entrance to MCDONALDS! This was not in the outfield stands like at Comiskey where the majority of the people surrounding the fight were other adult fans. This was Mc Donalds!! Home of the Happy Meal, Ronald McDonald, Grimace, the Hamburgler, and Mayor McCheese!!! I saw 4 or 5 little youngsters with there faces pressed against the glass with nervous looks on them as the brawl was developing.

Now I ask you: What are the odds that this makes the Moron Column??? Vegas has established the opening line at 1E100:1!!

34 Inch Stick
04-22-2002, 11:27 AM
Don't you hate it when you get those **** cramps in the middle of a run? I always figured it was the male pain equivalent of giving birth. At least you didn't draw mud. There is nothing more embarassing than gambling and losing.

cheeses_h_rice
04-22-2002, 11:48 AM
Originally posted by 34 Inch Stick
Don't you hate it when you get those **** cramps in the middle of a run? I always figured it was the male pain equivalent of giving birth. At least you didn't draw mud. There is nothing more embarassing than gambling and losing.

Heh, I've taken that gamble and lost.

I didn't so much "draw mud" as end up having to do my business in an alley about 5 miles away from my apartment. I felt like such a dog...literally.

The moral of the story is, never eat a bowl of granola before embarking on a 10-mile run!

nut_stock
04-22-2002, 02:43 PM
Originally posted by cheeses_h_rice

The moral of the story is, never eat a bowl of granola before embarking on a 10-mile run!

And I now regret reading this string.. I just ate damnit!

RedPinStripes
04-22-2002, 03:02 PM
The moron is too busy bashing the hawks and waiting for a Sox loss since he's avoiding teh Sox play so far.