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View Full Version : Whacky solutions thread


Railsplitter
06-25-2007, 09:19 AM
Since none of serious solutions to the Sox' woes seem to be working, lets try some whacy ones.

For example, have them try to hit objects smaller than a baseball in BP, such as golf balls.

kaufsox
06-25-2007, 10:28 AM
have them play in blindfolds, kind of like Luke in Star Wars when he's learning to use a lightsaber. "use the force Gooch" "Trust your feelings Josh" Have Hawk put on a fake beard and Jedi robes, dead ringer for Obiwan

Madvora
06-25-2007, 10:37 AM
Since none of serious solutions to the Sox' woes seem to be working, lets try some whacy ones.

For example, have them try to hit objects smaller than a baseball in BP, such as golf balls.
Start with beach balls. If they can actually hit those, then we can work our way down to baseball size.

RowanDye
06-25-2007, 10:45 AM
Trade for at least one major league quality hitter...no teal.

nsolo
06-25-2007, 11:00 AM
Start with beach balls. If they can actually hit those, then we can work our way down to baseball size.

I hope your not serious, unless you meant to have the beach balls on a tee.:D:

soxfan13
06-25-2007, 11:00 AM
Trade for the entire Milwaukee Brewers team.

soxfanatlanta
06-25-2007, 11:08 AM
Stop paying them. When they ask where the money is, JR can say, "Jeez, I mailed that out last week. You didn't get it yet?"

SaltyPretzel
06-25-2007, 11:34 AM
Fireproofing in the bullpen.

kevingrt
06-25-2007, 11:48 AM
Turn the lineup around one game with like Uribe, Terrero, Fields batting 1-2-3. Some little league stuff to get this team jazzed up.

Thome_Fan
06-25-2007, 11:51 AM
Get down on our knees and beg big Frankie to come back?

Maybe draft the world champ little league team...

*first edit* Better idea! Let AJ loose on a few of the more obnoxious Cubs fans to get the team pumped up. If nothing else, it would give us a good time.

areilly
06-25-2007, 12:01 PM
Lock the gates and forfeit the rest of the season. That way we're spared the pain of watching the inevitable.

Sad
06-25-2007, 12:03 PM
Trade for the entire Milwaukee Brewers team.

I'd settle for Corey Hart alone...

CLR01
06-25-2007, 12:18 PM
Since none of serious solutions to the Sox' woes seem to be working, lets try some whacy ones.

For example, have them try to hit objects smaller than a baseball in BP, such as golf balls.

Ummm no...you think some of these guys screw themselves into the ground now just wait until they start hitting those golf balls 700 feet in batting practice. Juan may literally twist his upper body away from the lower.


I think we need to offer Anderson to the gods.

Madvora
06-25-2007, 12:29 PM
Let them chase chickens around a pen like Rocky did.

It won't be easy, it won't have a point, but I would bet Uribe would catch at least 3 by the time Thome would catch 1.

UserNameBlank
06-25-2007, 12:44 PM
Ozzie should play every game under protest.

Paulie should always run the bases with a beer in his hand.

The Sox should petition MLB to enact some kind of slaughter rule and then we should start the bullpen everyday. That way when the game is officially called in the 2nd inning everyone can go home since no one wants to be there anyway.

Juan Uribe should bring a pillow and a blanket to SS so that way he's more comfortable when he falls asleep on defense.

All food and beverages in the clubhouse should be kept in sealed plastic tupperware containers so that way nothing spills when Kenny flips the tables over.

Bring Ed Farmer and Chris Singleton into the TV booth too. There's no reason to have anyone on the radio anyway since they never give out the score. Just have Comcast switch over from the game to some replay of some golf tournament in 1974 since that's the only thing they'll be talking about anyway.

Trade for Milton Bradley and Elijah Dukes, call up Brian Anderson, and let them have a three-way fistfight in the outfield. The winner gets the title of worst cancer ever.

Buy a huge block of ice so Darin Erstad can carve out an ice sculpture depicting himself carving out an ice sculpture of himself during those slow half innings where our bullpen walks more than 30 batters.

Let Ronnie Woo Woo into the park with all of his friends. Then tell Pods to go hang out with the rest of the bums.

...and that's all I can think of now.

Chicken Dinner
06-25-2007, 01:10 PM
http://www.whitesoxinteractive.com/vbulletin/attachment.php?attachmentid=5417&stc=1&d=1182791379

thechico
06-25-2007, 04:21 PM
Since none of serious solutions to the Sox' woes seem to be working, lets try some whacy ones.

I already suggested a knuckler. Nobody liked that one.
http://www.whitesoxinteractive.com/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=88993&highlight=knuckler

nccwsfan
06-25-2007, 05:53 PM
Let them chase chickens around a pen like Rocky did.

It won't be easy, it won't have a point, but I would bet Uribe would catch at least 3 by the time Thome would catch 1.

Running through the city before dawn

One armed pushups

Tying their left hand behind their backs and hitting the punching bag with only their right. That way when their opponent comes at them they'll be thrown off by the more ambidextrous White Sox lineup.

Punching meat in a meat locker


and so on and so on...