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DrCrawdad
07-06-2005, 08:20 PM
I'm thrilled that Podzilla won the spot on the AL All Star team. With the Sox playing so well and the Cubune running their dark cloud headlines and articles, I was wondering what the Cubune headline will be tomorrow.

What do you think it might be?

Here's mine...

SOX FANS STEAL ELECTION

NSSoxFan
07-06-2005, 08:23 PM
EX-BREWER WINS "FINAL VOTE"

illinibk
07-06-2005, 08:24 PM
I'm thrilled that Podzilla won the spot on the AL All Star team. With the Sox playing so well and the Cubune running their dark cloud headlines and articles, I was wondering what the Cubune headline will be tomorrow.

What do you think it might be?

Here's mine...

SOX FANS STEAL ELECTION
CUBS RAINED OUT

Crazy Fans Elect Podsednick

White Sox Josh
07-06-2005, 08:24 PM
MOTHER NATURE ROBS MARK PRIOR AND GREAT CUBS FANS OF CUBS WIN

MLB doesn't count missing All Star Ballots as Podsednik Wins Unfairly.

rowand33
07-06-2005, 08:24 PM
CUBS RAINED OUT

Crazy Fans Elect Podsednick


exactly what I was gonna say, except without the Pods part.

RKMeibalane
07-06-2005, 08:25 PM
Jeter Loses Vote

propaneman
07-06-2005, 08:28 PM
D.Lee will be back Today


C.Lee replacement barely gets in all-star game

Muopsies
07-06-2005, 08:29 PM
Dewey Defeats Truman

Chips
07-06-2005, 08:31 PM
Dewey Defeats Truman

brilliant

Frankfan4life
07-06-2005, 08:32 PM
SOX FANS VOTE PODSEDNIK INTO ALL STAR GAME
But Cubs Have Better Attendance

buehrle4cy05
07-06-2005, 08:33 PM
PRIOR'S PERFECT GAME POSTPONED A DAY
The guy who was traded in a bad deal for Carlos Lee somehow cheats his way into the All-Star game, WHICH INCLUDES TRIPLE CROWN GUARANTEE DERREK LEE AND SUPER-STEAL ARAMIS RAMIREZ

ondafarm
07-06-2005, 08:37 PM
Dewey Defeats Truman

How about,

Jeter Defeats Podsednik

JRIG
07-06-2005, 08:41 PM
BRACING FOR DISASTER

Four White Sox playing in "exhibition" All-Star Game guarantees fade down the stretch, destroys playoff hopes

Frankfan4life
07-06-2005, 08:41 PM
The guy who was traded in a bad deal for Carlos Lee somehow cheats his way into the All-Star game,That line is genius!

Cowhead418
07-06-2005, 08:41 PM
CLASSLESS FANS VOTE IN LESS DESERVING CANDIDATE. JETER RECEIVES BIGGEST SNUB EVER.

Frankfan4life
07-06-2005, 08:45 PM
SOX FANS STEAL ELECTIONGood, but how about this...

SPEEDY PODSEDNIK STEALS ELECTION

soxjim
07-06-2005, 08:58 PM
Cubs get rained out. Only 1/2 game out of 2nd place.

CubsfansareDRUNK
07-06-2005, 09:03 PM
Cubs get rained out. Only 1/2 game out of 2nd place.

ahahahaha.

CUBS WILD CARD CHANCES NOT DESTROYED YET

Chips
07-06-2005, 09:06 PM
I can't think of anything clever.:?:

The Racehorse
07-06-2005, 09:08 PM
Cubs Surging Toward Wild Card Despite Rainout

Lou's Pesky Rays Fall To Sox

PicktoCLick72
07-06-2005, 09:09 PM
Derrek Lee is still starting at first in Midsummer's Classic. Posednik is last All-Star voted in.

batmanZoSo
07-06-2005, 09:12 PM
Smut Sox pull another fast one on MLB, fans
See Jay Mariotti, page 96 The Last Word

ATXBMX
07-06-2005, 09:13 PM
Boss bounces check to Selig, Demands trade. Giambi/Womack for Podsednik + cash.

Iwritecode
07-06-2005, 09:14 PM
Cubs Rained Out

Jeter Snubbed From All-Star Appearance

DC Sox Fan
07-06-2005, 09:15 PM
RAIN RAIN GO AWAY

Surefire Cubs win averted by that bitch, mother nature.

Presednik steals election, Florida awaits recount.

Chips
07-06-2005, 09:21 PM
CUBS AVOID SWEEP

CubsfansareDRUNK
07-06-2005, 09:22 PM
CUBS AVOID SWEEP

ahaha, now thats clever

Sonik22
07-06-2005, 09:24 PM
White Sox prepare for second half slide


Cubs Rainout delays their run for 100 wins.

Erik The Red
07-06-2005, 09:36 PM
How about,

Jeter Defeats Podsednik
Done and done.

http://erik-the-red.net/images/cubuneheadline.jpg

owensmouth
07-06-2005, 09:51 PM
Ronnie Woo Woo Leads Sox to Victory

ChiFabulous1
07-06-2005, 09:51 PM
If you go to google news the first sports story is from the NY Times
In This Vote, Jeter and Matsui Lose

ma_deuce
07-06-2005, 09:53 PM
Sox Squeak by Slumping Rays; Prepare for Ass-Pounding from Streaking A's

Chips
07-06-2005, 09:54 PM
LONDON TO HOST OLYMPICS IN 2012

MIgrenade
07-06-2005, 09:56 PM
Rolling Toward Disaster

I figured this would be taken by now.

lukesappling
07-06-2005, 10:00 PM
Morgan Snubs Ryno

TommyJohn
07-06-2005, 10:00 PM
Dewey Defeats Truman

Love it. How about, in the great Tribune tradition

Jeter Defeats Podsednik

EDIT: Bah. someone thought of it before me.

White Sox Josh
07-06-2005, 10:01 PM
CUBS WIN RAIN DELAY!
Mark Prior on track for Cy Young
Sox almost lose to the Devil Rays; Podsednik cheats and votes for himself.

Stroker Ace
07-06-2005, 10:03 PM
MOTHER NATURE POSTPONES CUB VICTORY

Sox barely squeak out a sweep over slumping Devil Rays

SOXPHILE
07-06-2005, 10:03 PM
Losing Streak Snapped
Rainout Gives Tired Cubs A Much Needed Rest


Sox Podsednik Slips Into All Star Game on Final Day

Derrek Lee Watch -pages 2 & 3

Cubs Will Reach Playoffs- page 4
Paul Sullivan's Breakdown on How the Cubs 2nd Half Surge Will Win Both the Division & Wild Card.

White Sox Kick Last Place D-Rays when they're down- page 5

Back Page- The 2001 Mariners & 2005 Sox... Deja Vu ?

chisoxmike
07-06-2005, 10:07 PM
Contreras Can't Get Past 7th inning, Sox pitching continues Fall.


Let's Play Two: Joyful Day tomorrow As Cubs play two, Sox off.

Recount Underway Looking For Voting Irregulatrites in MLB All-Star Jeter Snub.

Muopsies
07-06-2005, 10:09 PM
How about,

Jeter Defeats Podsednik

That'll work too

DrCrawdad
07-06-2005, 10:09 PM
Done and done.

http://erik-the-red.net/images/cubuneheadline.jpg


THAT IS AWESOME!!!

:bandance: :supernana: :bandance:

CubsfansareDRUNK
07-06-2005, 10:11 PM
wow, you know how hilarious it would be if the cubs lost both games tomorrow?

TommyJohn
07-06-2005, 10:12 PM
Podsednik makes it the "Chicago Way"

The late Mayor Richard J. Daley, a lifelong White Sox fan, would be proud
of the way his fellow Sox fans voted for Scott Podsednik, that is "early
and often." Or perhaps it was Derek Jeter's five o'clock shadow that did
him in. Either way, Scott Podsednik is an All-Star and Derek Jeter will
stay home and commiserate with Yankee fans about the Great Stolen
All-Star Election of 2005.

The above is, of course, a lead paragraph for Morrissey or Gonzales.

EDIT: I am reading this thread again. My God. Are we a bunch of cynical
bastards or what?

TornLabrum
07-06-2005, 10:26 PM
Podsednik makes it the "Chicago Way"

The late Mayor Richard J. Daley, a lifelong White Sox fan, would be proud
of the way his fellow Sox fans voted for Scott Podsednik, that is "early
and often." Or perhaps it was Derek Jeter's five o'clock shadow that did
him in. Either way, Scott Podsednik is an All-Star and Derek Jeter will
stay home and commiserate with Yankee fans about the Great Stolen
All-Star Election of 2005.

The above is, of course, a lead paragraph for Morrissey or Gonzales.

EDIT: I am reading this thread again. My God. Are we a bunch of cynical
bastards or what?

It ceases to become cynicism when the actual headlines are actually that bad. And they are.

santo=dorf
07-06-2005, 10:34 PM
Boneheaded, poor Sox fans use computers, (presumably from public library) to steal election for known stealer.
White Sox player expected to sit on the bench during mid-summer classic.

Fungo
07-06-2005, 10:46 PM
Zambrano scratched from next start as tendinitis flares up, Jeter validation numbers to blame

C-Dawg
07-06-2005, 10:46 PM
Season Pauses for All-Star Game

"This Year It Counts" Grows Ever More Tiresome in Meaningless Game

Against All Odds Four Chisox on All-Star Roster

DrCrawdad
07-06-2005, 10:47 PM
It ceases to become cynicism when the actual headlines are actually that bad. And they are.

You're right Hal. If you can't change it then let's have fun with it.

DrCrawdad
07-06-2005, 10:48 PM
Podsednik makes it the "Chicago Way"

The late Mayor Richard J. Daley, a lifelong White Sox fan, would be proud
of the way his fellow Sox fans voted for Scott Podsednik, that is "early
and often." Or perhaps it was Derek Jeter's five o'clock shadow that did
him in. Either way, Scott Podsednik is an All-Star and Derek Jeter will
stay home and commiserate with Yankee fans about the Great Stolen
All-Star Election of 2005.

The above is, of course, a lead paragraph for Morrissey or Gonzales.

EDIT: I am reading this thread again. My God. Are we a bunch of cynical
bastards or what?

We are cynical, but the bastards are Gonzales, Morrissey, Teddie Greenbean and the rest of the Cubune corporate asskissers.

slobes
07-06-2005, 10:49 PM
MOTHER NATURE POSTPONES INEVITABLE CUBS VICTORY

Selfish White Sox outfielder basks in the glory of barely nabbing the last all-star spot.

LuvSox
07-06-2005, 10:51 PM
Mark Prior And Kerry Wood Have Love Child, Baby Placed On 15 Day Dl.

Jerko
07-06-2005, 10:53 PM
D-LEE.

He's no C-LEE.

Chips
07-06-2005, 10:54 PM
Mark Prior And Kerry Wood Have Love Child, Baby Placed On 15 Day Dl.

Excellent.

ATXBMX
07-06-2005, 10:55 PM
Mark Prior And Kerry Wood Have Love Child, Baby Placed On 15 Day Dl.

Wow, now that is funny. :D:

Sonik22
07-06-2005, 10:56 PM
Those last two were good especially luvsox's i loooove that one!

PaleHoseGeorge
07-06-2005, 10:58 PM
Prior wins simulated game in Atlanta

Dusty says "Wood looked good" throwing on side

DaleJRFan
07-06-2005, 10:59 PM
NO SOX STARTING IN ALL-STAR GAME
Podsednik reduced to relying on fans in "Final Vote" to make the roster for mid-summer classic

SOXfnNlansing
07-06-2005, 10:59 PM
YANKEE VOTE SPLIT........................ SOX LF SLIDES IN 1ST

Hitmen77
07-06-2005, 11:00 PM
The Last Time the Sox Had 4 All-Stars, They Failed to Make the Playoffs.
Does Similar Fate Await 2005 Squad? Comparison of '75 and '05 Sox.

Page 2: Cubs may have fewer all-stars, but they have better attendance.

TomBradley72
07-06-2005, 11:00 PM
Somber All-Star

chitownhawkfan
07-06-2005, 11:03 PM
The Last Time the Sox Had 4 All-Stars, They Failed to Make the Playoffs.
Does Similar Fate Await 2005 Squad? Comparison of '75 and '05 Sox.

Page 2: Cubs may have fewer all-stars, but they have better attendance.

:rolling:

Chips
07-06-2005, 11:10 PM
The Last Time the Sox Had 4 All-Stars, They Failed to Make the Playoffs.
Does Similar Fate Await 2005 Squad? Comparison of '75 and '05 Sox.

Page 2: Cubs may have fewer all-stars, but they have better attendance.

That really would not surprise me.

soxfan123
07-06-2005, 11:18 PM
Schilling To Close Games For Red Sox

Cubs Losing Streak Snapped

Some Guy Named Podsednik Makes All-star Game In The "i Feel Sorry For You" Vote

DrCrawdad
07-06-2005, 11:21 PM
YANKEE VOTE SPLIT........................ SOX LF SLIDES IN 1ST

Hey, SoxFnnLansing send me an mail (drcrawdad@mac.com) I've got a question for you.

PS I would have sent you a WSI Private Message but you have that blocked.

TimoandAaron
07-06-2005, 11:21 PM
CUBS GAME IS RAINED OUT AND SOX PLAYERS THROW THEIR BATS IN DISGUST AS THEY SQUAK PAST THE DEVIL RAYS. Oh yea, some guy on the sox was put on the All-star team.

FielderJones
07-06-2005, 11:25 PM
All-Star Podsednik wins Internet fan voting
Scott Podsednik leads the majors in stolen bases, and he pulled off one of his greatest acts of thievery Wednesday night.

linky (http://chicagosports.chicagotribune.com/sports/baseball/whitesox/cs-050706soxpodsednik,1,3890014.story?coll=cs-home-headlines)

Of course, they had to insinuate the Jeter was robbed.

TornLabrum
07-06-2005, 11:35 PM
All-Star Podsednik wins Internet fan voting
Scott Podsednik leads the majors in stolen bases, and he pulled off one of his greatest acts of thievery Wednesday night.

linky (http://chicagosports.chicagotribune.com/sports/baseball/whitesox/cs-050706soxpodsednik,1,3890014.story?coll=cs-home-headlines)

Of course, they had to insinuate the Jeter was robbed.




Ya gotta love that Mark Gonzales.

Optipessimism
07-07-2005, 12:59 AM
Cubs Interested in Sox All-Star

Could Sergio Mitre be headed to the South Side?

gosox3072
07-07-2005, 01:38 AM
Sox Pitchers Get Carpal Tunnel From All-Star Voting

Sox downfall begins as Buehrle Garland go down from too much computer time

StockdaleForVeep
07-07-2005, 01:41 AM
I'm thrilled that Podzilla won the spot on the AL All Star team. With the Sox playing so well and the Cubune running their dark cloud headlines and articles, I was wondering what the Cubune headline will be tomorrow.

What do you think it might be?

Here's mine...

SOX FANS STEAL ELECTION

Actually i wanna see the NY TIMES headline to see how they report the "injustice" done to the messiah, er i mean Jeter.....
Can someone post what their paper states?

Maybe steinbrenner will pay off selig to throw out some of the podsednik votes due to "Technical errors"

"Off to the races in detroit"::picture of pods stealin 2nd or 3rd

MrRoboto83
07-07-2005, 02:26 AM
ROLEN INJURED, 2 CUBS TO START ALL-STAR GAME


Pods makes final vote with no home runs!! SOX have 4 reserve players in.

CanBuehrleWait
07-07-2005, 03:21 AM
Mark Prior And Kerry Wood Have Love Child, Baby Placed On 15 Day Dl.

Dewey Defeats Truman

RAIN RAIN GO AWAY

Surefire Cubs win averted by that bitch, mother nature.

Presednik steals election, Florida awaits recount.

These 3 killed me. :roflmao::rolling::rolling:

SOX LA Mikey
07-07-2005, 03:40 AM
Podsednik steals 1st
(all star appearance)

wins election to ride the bench in Detroit

MrRoboto83
07-07-2005, 04:17 AM
Cub fans blame "This Old Cub's" journey from Arizona as the new curse, as the Cubs fall into 3rd place.




clubhouse cancer Frank Thomas is greedly swinging for the fences

chuckn98229
07-07-2005, 04:28 AM
How Can You Have An All-Star Game Without The Messiah And Carrie Woods?

Maximo
07-07-2005, 05:31 AM
"Santo Supports HOF Internet Fan Voting".

LuvSox
07-07-2005, 05:46 AM
Cub fans blame "This Old Cub's" journey from Arizona as the new curse, as the Cubs fall into 3rd place.

I could actually see this one happening.

TommyJohn
07-07-2005, 07:59 AM
The Last Time the Sox Had 4 All-Stars, They Failed to Make the Playoffs.
Does Similar Fate Await 2005 Squad? Comparison of '75 and '05 Sox.

Page 2: Cubs may have fewer all-stars, but they have better attendance.

1975 was the season before the Sox nearly moved to Seattle. Picture that headline.

GoSox2K3
07-07-2005, 08:04 AM
Sox Make Mockery of All-Star Process
-Team Resorts to Shameless Begging for Votes
-Entire Sox Fan Base of 5000 Votes 800 Times Each to Give Podsednik 4 million Votes.
-MLB to Re-evaluate Internet Voting Process After Jeter-Snub Travesty
-Comparing Jeter's All-Star Snub to Santo's HOF Snub.

Also in Today's Cubune:
- Sports: Cubs Poised to Seize Wild Card Lead in 2nd Half
- Tempo: 1st of 10 Part Series on Dedicated Cub Fans and their Endless Worshiping of Wrigley Shrine.
- Letters to Editor: a) We are sick and tired of Sox coverage. b) Sox fans are rude and hateful. c) We love our Cubbies!

Hangar18
07-07-2005, 08:48 AM
SOX win meaningless game
*Coming next week, Special Cubs All-Star Pullout Section!*

Devil Rays Lose tough one
Santo didnt need votes for AS appearance

TommyJohn
07-07-2005, 09:01 AM
It ceases to become cynicism when the actual headlines are actually that bad. And they are.

You're right. Maybe sick and tired of Tribune BS would be better.

TommyJohn
07-07-2005, 09:03 AM
We are cynical, but the bastards are Gonzales, Morrissey, Teddie Greenbean and the rest of the Cubune corporate asskissers.

Yeah, maybe "bastards" although meant tongue-in-cheek, was a poor choice of words.

downstairs
07-07-2005, 09:07 AM
All-Star Team Now Stacked With NL Central Stars
Oswalt Rides Cubs/Cardinals Popularity to Win Fan's Vote


Former NL Central Star Podsednik Voted In As Well.


Braves Cancel Cubs Game, Avoid Loss to Prior
Prior to Mound Today as Surging Cubs Look To Take Over 2nd in Powerful NL Central


Jeter to Sit Out All-Star Game, Get Much Needed Rest


Red Sox, Cardinals, White Sox Scores (Page 32) >>

Fungo
07-07-2005, 09:09 AM
Prior wins simulated game in Atlanta

Dusty says "Wood looked good" throwing on side

George,

I've been waiting for the one that say either Prior or Wood got shelled in a simulated game and was pulled after 2 innings. I also wonder about bother their records in those games.

or

Wood finally gets over the hump as the right hander notches his 15th victory in simulated games.

downstairs
07-07-2005, 09:11 AM
Wood finally gets over the hump as the right hander notches his 15th victory in simulated games.

Actually, he's 7-8 this year in simulated games....

:cool:

infohawk
07-07-2005, 09:13 AM
CUBS GETS RESTRAINING ORDER PLACED ON STEVE STONE
TEAM NOW POSITIONED FOR SECOND-HALF PLAYOFF PUSH

Madvora
07-07-2005, 09:33 AM
Yankees Pretty Boy Reduced To Tears As His Friends Won't Let Him Play.


(Actually, I'd like to get a hold of that paper)

Hitmen77
07-07-2005, 09:49 AM
Smut Sox pull another fast one on MLB, fans
See Jay Mariotti, page 96 The Last Word


Actually, that would be a Cub-Times headline if Jay Mariotti is involved. I can definitely see that as a heading to a Moronotti article!

White Sox Josh
07-07-2005, 09:56 AM
CUBS ONLY 12.5 BACK OF CARDINALS!
Page 2-3: Paul Sullivan describes how Cubs won't have Stone in the Booth to distract them in 2nd Half.
Sox Cheat and Endorse Podsednik; Sox Lead Only 10.5 Games ahead of Surging Twins.

eriqjaffe
07-07-2005, 10:14 AM
HENDRY: "NOMAR FOR PODSEDNIK IS A VERY REAL POSSIBILITY"
Sox GM Williams "elated" at possibility of acquiring a legitimate All-Star.

God creates Tropical Storm Cindy to halt Cubs losing streak and give Prior extra day off. "He pitches better on a month's rest, but there's only so much I can do," Lord says at press conference.

Thomas hits 11th home run in 72 at-bats, proving fallacy of "Small-Ball".

TommyJohn
07-07-2005, 10:33 AM
God creates Tropical Storm Cindy to halt Cubs losing streak and give Prior extra day off. "He pitches better on a month's rest, but there's only so much I can do," Lord says at press conference.




You mean He can't do more for His own son?

quade36
07-07-2005, 10:35 AM
SouthSide Delight :)

SOXSINCE'70
07-07-2005, 10:47 AM
THE SOX STILL SUCK.BELIEVE US,WE OWN THE
MOST OVERRATED TEAM IN BASEBALL.:angry: :angry: :angry:

Hitmen77
07-07-2005, 11:14 AM
Done and done.

http://erik-the-red.net/images/cubuneheadline.jpg

I'm late in responding to this, but that is GREAT!

SOXSINCE'70
07-07-2005, 11:39 AM
I can't think of anything clever.:?:

Don't feel bad.Neither can the Cubune or Scum Times.:roflmao: :roflmao:

MasQbellesa
07-07-2005, 01:11 PM
Funny stuff guys...now i'll have to look online to see what they really ran!

GO SOX

WhiteSoxFan84
07-07-2005, 01:32 PM
MOST DESERVING CANDIDATE MAKES IT THROUGH FINAL VOTE
PODSEDNIK BEATS OUT JETER AND MATSUI

Hitmen77
07-07-2005, 01:39 PM
Don't feel bad.Neither can the Cubune or Scum Times.:roflmao: :roflmao:

Why is this in teal?

Hitmen77
07-07-2005, 01:40 PM
:tomatoaward
Lots of funny predictions. Sadly, many are very believable as Cubune headlines.

tacosalbarojas
07-07-2005, 01:45 PM
This thread rocks! It had me convulsing in tears of laughter. Good calls all around, mocking the Trib headlines - particularly 'rolling toward disaster' - yeah they wish so in the Trib Tower. And especially good catch on the comparison between SOX teams of yore that didn't win and this year's team as authored by Bob Vanderberg that they've been running.

melinchicago
07-07-2005, 04:44 PM
You guys crack me up!!!


:D:

PaleHoseGeorge
07-07-2005, 05:05 PM
Here you go...

: cubune

equals...

:cubune

I was tempted to name this smilie :mcgrath. That's to honor Dan McGrath, the unbiased Sox Fan who serves as Cubune sports editor. He is directly responsible for all the headlines he claimed were perfectly fair when asked by that dope from the Wall Street Journal how Pravda writes unbiased reports on the Cold War. And the kid believed him!
:roflmao:

And who can doubt his sincerity? He has George Knue making a vain attempt to convince us, too.
:wink:

I suspect : cubune will be getting a lot of work the remainder of the summer and beyond. George Knue has his work cut out for him.
:cool:

TwinGats
07-07-2005, 05:53 PM
THE SOX STILL SUCK.BELIEVE US,WE OWN THE
MOST OVERRATED TEAM IN BASEBALL.:angry: :angry: :angry:

way to tell it like it is!!!!:D:

StillMissOzzie
07-07-2005, 06:22 PM
MLB's LEADING THIEF STEALS ELECTION


YANKEE FANS LEFT SOBBING AT THE INJUSTICE.



Awesome is overused, but Erik the Red, that PhotoShop job was AWESOME!!!

SMO
:gulp:

StillMissOzzie
07-07-2005, 06:24 PM
It ceases to become cynicism when the actual headlines are actually that bad. And they are.

"The power of accurate observation is often called cynicism by those who haven't got it." - George Bernard Shaw

One of my all-time favorite quotes, TL, and so appropriate.

SMO
:gulp:

RallyBowl
07-07-2005, 06:30 PM
:threadrules: YOU GUYS ROCK.

nedlug
07-07-2005, 06:55 PM
I loooove this thread!

row18
07-07-2005, 09:10 PM
Mark Prior And Kerry Wood Have Love Child, Baby Placed On 15 Day Dl.

That's classic, you almost killed me!

The Wall
07-07-2005, 09:32 PM
wow, you know how hilarious it would be if the cubs lost both games tomorrow?

Granted that one too :bandance:

RadioheadRocks
07-07-2005, 09:33 PM
"Hey, Let's Lose Two!!!"

nedlug
07-07-2005, 10:28 PM
I think that Prior-Wood love child headline deserves very strong POTW consideration.

ChiSox14305635
07-07-2005, 10:32 PM
Patterson and Dubois sent down; Revitalized Cubs ready to start anew





















Streaking A's team looking to cool White-hot Sox.

SOXfnNlansing
07-07-2005, 10:35 PM
Patterson and Dubois sent to AAA Iowa CUB BRASS HOPE TO BOLSTER THE AAA AFFILIATE'S ATTENDANCE

Kevin
07-07-2005, 10:40 PM
Can the Iowa paper PLEASE use "Dubois are back in town"?

nedlug
07-07-2005, 10:42 PM
Patterson and Dubois sent to AAA Iowa CUB BRASS HOPE TO BOLSTER THE AAA AFFILIATE'S ATTENDANCE

Iowa Cubs tripling Charlotte Knights attendance : Knights play in 'bad area'

MrRoboto83
07-07-2005, 11:06 PM
Dusty's plan for Cubs stepping back before they catch the Red Birds





Jeter sues White Sox

cheeses_h_rice
07-07-2005, 11:13 PM
"Hey, Let's Lose Two!!!"

*****!

:thumbsup:

Hitmen77
07-07-2005, 11:20 PM
CUBS AVOID SWEEP

Make that: Cubs DELAY Sweep :D:

RedHeadPaleHoser
07-08-2005, 08:29 AM
CUBS STREAK INTACT

eriqjaffe
07-08-2005, 08:44 AM
Patterson, Dubois optioned to AAA
Hendry: "The additional westerly winds their combined bats will produce in Des Moines will help push more fly balls out of beautiful Wrigley Field."

Off-day for Sox ends winning streak, assures fourth-place finish.

bigfoot
07-08-2005, 09:24 AM
Brenley, New Cubs Manager




Sox clinch AL pennant(pg 6)

Hitmen77
07-08-2005, 01:41 PM
Predicted Cubune Headline:
Baseball Season Effectively Over in Chicago
After Cubs Swept by Atlanta, Chicago Awaits Bears Training Camp

Madvora
07-08-2005, 02:04 PM
Baseball Season Effectively Over in Chicago
After Cubs Swept by Atlanta, Chicago Awaits Bears Training Camp
Very nice.

miker
07-08-2005, 02:48 PM
ALIENS IN UFOs RIG ALL-STAR VOTING
Deserving Cubs, Yankees Deliberately Kept Out
of Mid-Summer Classic by Species of Higher Intelligence

eriqjaffe
07-08-2005, 03:04 PM
How could I have forgotten this one...

SELIG: INTERNET VOTING "MY WORST IDEA EVER."

Captian Ron
07-08-2005, 03:09 PM
MAN GOES TO THE BATHROOM ON WOMENS LAWN IN WRIGLEYVILLE:gulp:

Erik The Red
07-08-2005, 03:13 PM
Awesome is overused, but Erik the Red, that PhotoShop job was AWESOME!!!
Thank you :smile: I honestly thought someone would beat me to it, hehe.

BNLSox
07-08-2005, 03:21 PM
Every idea I had when I first read this has not only been done in this thread, but executed with brilliance. Proud of you guys! Great Thread!!

Hitmen77
07-08-2005, 04:14 PM
MAN GOES TO THE BATHROOM ON WOMENS LAWN IN WRIGLEYVILLE:gulp:

No way would the Cubune ever report this! This would only be newsworthy to them if it happened near the Cell.

fisk4ever
07-08-2005, 04:32 PM
wow, you know how hilarious it would be if the cubs lost both games tomorrow?

It was very.

SoxWillWin
07-08-2005, 04:49 PM
Online voting for All Star Game as suspect as our online polls.

Podsednik wins with 3.9 million votes from one person

Hoffdaddydmb
07-09-2005, 06:31 PM
Podsednik voted into Allstars
Tribune annouces discovery of 2nd baseball team in Chicago

itsnotrequired
07-09-2005, 08:46 PM
Cubs extend winning streak

Sox drop 2 in a row, fire sale on the horizon?

Hitmen77
07-09-2005, 08:49 PM
If deep pink means wishful thinking:

Sox option Willie Harris to AAA
Failure to execute in Friday's game the last straw for team.

ChiSox14305635
07-10-2005, 11:17 AM
Cubs streaking towards wildcard with an 8-2 shellacking of hapless Marlins.

A dominant effort by Kerry Woods results in almost 8 innings pitched (so much for lack of durability) with only 2 runs scored off of him. The highlight was Carlos Zambrano scoring from 1st on a double. Zambrano, who was pinch running for Adam Greenberg after Greenberg was drilled intentionally by Florida pitcher Valerio De Los Santos scampered home much to the delight of teammates and manager Dusty Baker, who quoted afterwards, "Well, better he sprain his ankle running than his wrist net surfing". Greg Maddox goes for the sweep today against fellow AARP pitcher, Al Lighter.


A's throttle Buehrle, Sox (again)

Despite a rarity these days at Telecommunications Park (a sellout), Barry Zito repeated his brilliant dominance against the White Sox for the 2nd time in a week. Zito overmatched Sox hitters for 7 innings and managed to strike out Aaron Rowand 3 times (Editor comment: Maybe Patterson wasn't the only Chicago centerfielder that should've been sent down). Buehrle worked his way in and out of trouble for 6 innings before finally getting drilled in the 7th due to a fielding error by Antonio Ozuna and the big blow, a 3 run shot by Mark Kotsay (celebrating a new 2 yr deal). The Sox lone run came off the bat of Frank Thomas, who drove in the run with a sac fly to the CF warning track. Later, Guillen would chastise Thomas for not getting "all of it". Dan Haren goes for the sweep against Freddy Garcia, who despite a strong record while pitching day games, just doesn't have the same stuff on Sundays.

The sad thing is, I wouldn't be surprised if these were the real headlines. :rolleyes:

howzer12
07-16-2005, 03:08 PM
The Bears are in pads in Bourbonnais:bandance:

The Racehorse
07-16-2005, 06:16 PM
Maddux Should Have Won Number 314

Buerhle Wins Number 1 in Season's 2nd-Half

Buehrle > Wood
07-16-2005, 06:24 PM
Maddux valiant in defeat.


Buehrle goes head hunting

downstairs
07-16-2005, 06:45 PM
Cubbies 5 1/2 games out from another playoff season

Bears practice notes

Bulls look to improve on great season

CHI AL pitcher Burley resorts to attempted murder in ugly win.

eastchicagosoxfan
07-16-2005, 07:30 PM
Cubs Continue to Sell Out Wrigley Even in Defeat.



smartball=meanball?

whitesoxfan
07-16-2005, 07:38 PM
Cubs Shut Down by Future HOF Duke

Rex Grossman gets married. Pg 5

Bulls talk with Curry. Pg 7

Truex wins thriller in Busch race. Not in this paper

White Sox go to 60 wins, but nearly blow huge lead. Back page.

chisoxfan64
07-16-2005, 07:43 PM
Maddux Twirls A Gem!!!!!
In Cub Loss. The other team played today too.

RadioheadRocks
07-16-2005, 07:44 PM
Nothing Can Stop the Duke of Pittsburgh

Wirtzsucks19
07-16-2005, 09:11 PM
CHI AL pitcher Burley resorts to attempted murder in ugly win.

:rolling:

buehrle4cy05
07-16-2005, 09:38 PM
White Sox:
Beanballs and Bullpen Blunders, Sox losing momentum

Cubs:
Strong all-around effort not enough to overthrow Duke, but Mesa nearly blows save

nedlug
07-16-2005, 10:48 PM
Will this be a daily thing? i certainly hope so! You guys are great!

soxjim
07-16-2005, 11:05 PM
CUBS LOSE TO A DUKE


BEAR CAMP SET TO OPEN

Sox hold on to 11 game lead

kj.hayes
07-16-2005, 11:07 PM
A DATE WITH DESTINY
MADDUX ON TRACK TO JOIN 3K STRIKEOUT CLUB

CHICAGO AMERICAN LEAGUE CLUB BARELY ESCAPES DEVESTATING LOSS TO CLEVELAND INDIANS

IN LOCAL NEWS: BRIDGEPORT - STILL THE MURDER AND POVERTY CAPITAL OF CHICAGO?

Hitmen77
07-16-2005, 11:33 PM
Will this be a daily thing? i certainly hope so! You guys are great!

As long as the real Sox headlines continue to have "dark cloud" overtones and the Cub headlines continue to be laughably upbeat. In other words, YES!

Hitmen77
07-16-2005, 11:42 PM
Interest in Sox Waning?
- With 11 game lead and lack of close contender for AL Central crown , apathy for Sox on the rise.
- Absence of close race may equal more poor attendance
- Cubs race for NL Wild Card more exciting for fans

zach23
07-17-2005, 12:01 AM
Circle The Wagons!
- Sox survive late attack by Tribe.
- Sox bullpen in shambles. Team manages to maintain slim division lead, but how long can it last with no relief?
- Hall of Famer Maddux denied glorious win because fickle wind decided to blow in during cubs' at-bats.
- Wrigleyville voted "Greatest place on the face of the earth" by all of humanity.

The Racehorse
07-17-2005, 12:17 AM
- Wrigleyville voted "Greatest place on the face of the earth" by all of humanity.

LOL, I like that one alot. :cool:

nedlug
07-17-2005, 12:25 AM
Maddux thrills the world
Al Leiter to Yankees, pg.3
Schilling much more successful, pg. 6
Do White Sox replica jerseys cause cancer? Investigative report, pg.8
Buerhle classless in somber win, pg. 45

SomebodyToldMe
07-17-2005, 12:46 AM
Do White Sox replica jerseys cause cancer? Investigative report, pg.8

HAHAHAHA :roflmao: :roflmao:

chuckn98229
07-17-2005, 01:02 AM
Is George what-his-name paying attention?? this is sooo representative of what he says is his newspaper's unbiased coverage of Chicago baseball. What a tool!

FielderJones
07-17-2005, 10:33 AM
Buerhle classless in somber win, pg. 45

Fairly close to the truth:

Buehrle's emotions mixed
Sorry about hitting Cleveland's Hafner during 11th victory

Although, I will give the Cubune credit for making the Sox headline larger than the Flubs for three days in a row, coming off the All-Star break.

TomBradley72
07-17-2005, 01:12 PM
Fairly close to the truth:

Buehrle's emotions mixed
Sorry about hitting Cleveland's Hafner during 11th victory

Although, I will give the Cubune credit for making the Sox headline larger than the Flubs for three days in a row, coming off the All-Star break.

Amazing...truth is stranger than fiction. Is there any chance in h**l that this would be the headline if Prior/Wood was pitching? Right up there with "Somber Streak", "Rolling Towards Danger" and "Losing Steam".

A_ROW33
07-17-2005, 01:22 PM
I also love how the main picture was of two guys from real madrid hugging eachother, since when in this country would an exhibition soccer game take precidence over a first place baseball team?

Clembasbal
07-17-2005, 03:51 PM
I also love how the main picture was of two guys from real madrid hugging eachother, since when in this country would an exhibition soccer game take precidence over a first place baseball team?

The best is the poll on the backpage of the Sports Section.

66% of people said "Who?" in regards to who those two footfairy team are.



~ Miracle on 35th Street, A HOME White Sox game that might sellout against a team not names THE CUBS! (Well it is half price Monday!)

Brian26
07-17-2005, 03:53 PM
I also love how the main picture was of two guys from real madrid hugging eachother, since when in this country would an exhibition soccer game take precidence over a first place baseball team?

Only in Bizzaro Chicago where the baseball season is just about over and we can't wait for two-a-days in Bourbanais.

The Racehorse
07-17-2005, 04:03 PM
Zambrano throws shutout, earned run-wise

Garland scatters 7 hits, escapes with win

The Racehorse
07-17-2005, 04:08 PM
Zambrano dazzles, Cy Young award still possible

Garland escapes multiple jams, lucky to get win

chisoxmike
07-17-2005, 04:10 PM
Selfish Sox Sweep Playoff Hopeful Team

CUBS TAKE 3 OF 4; MARCH TOWARDS DIVISON FLAG

FUTURE HOF MAGGLIO RETURNS TO SOUTH SIDE IN SELL-OUT.

MarySwiss
07-17-2005, 04:15 PM
CUBS WIN AGAIN!!

Sox continue to luck out against an injury-riddled Cleveland team.

chisoxmike
07-17-2005, 04:17 PM
CUBS 1-GAME OVER .500

Sox also win.

TornLabrum
07-17-2005, 04:18 PM
Zambrano Leads Cubs to Promised Land

Cubs .506 Percentage Best for Chicago NL Teams
First Step on Road to World Championship
Tiger Woods Wins British Open
Wood(s) Name Synonymous with Greatness

Page 6: Sox Squeek By Surging Indians
Hold Slim 12-Game Lead Over Surging Twins

chisoxmike
07-17-2005, 04:19 PM
Tiger Woods Wins British Open
Wood(s) Name Synonymous with Greatness



HA.

dcb33
07-17-2005, 04:20 PM
Troubling Similarities
Sox earn first 4 game sweep in Cleveland since 1963
Why should the Sox should be worried? See pg. 4 for the striking parallels in our in-depth comparison between the '05 and '63 squads

whitesoxfan
07-17-2005, 04:25 PM
Cubs blow out a young, talented Pirates team.

Tiger Woods wins British Open.

White Sox sweep struggling Indians team.

A_ROW33
07-17-2005, 04:25 PM
Sox dirty play on Saturday earns them a sweep but these Tigers have some fight in them.(article proceeds to explain tiger/royals fight and how farnsworth will pile drive frank thomas tomorrow.)

cheeses_h_rice
07-17-2005, 05:55 PM
ZAMBRANO DRIVES IN 2 IN THRILLING VICTORY
White Sox snap 42-year drought in Cleveland; Garland hitless but gets W

tacosalbarojas
07-17-2005, 06:48 PM
Tomorrow's headlines today:

Weekend Ratings In for Premiere of This Old Cub; Docudrama draws 9.8Sox stay hot in tepid Central; humble Hafner accepts insincere Buehrle apology

C-Dawg
07-17-2005, 06:56 PM
Zambrano masterful in blowout, Cubs rocket past Houston in standings
Sox to face dangerous Detroit team after tough series in Cleveland

Chips
07-17-2005, 07:07 PM
SOX SWEEP INDIANS

nedlug
07-17-2005, 07:53 PM
SOX SWEEP INDIANS

I hear the sirens!

zach23
07-17-2005, 09:02 PM
Face It, We Hate the Sox
- Ligue tries to go through Jewel express lane with more than 10 items. Details on pg. 2 with photos of Gamboa attack.
- Car accident occurs 3 blocks from whatever they call Comiskey park these days. Area is not safe for anyone.
- Sox aide in destruction of economy by selling tickets at half price.
- Cubs hammer tough NL Central foe and begin 2nd half dominance over all of baseball.
- Ronnie "Woo Woo" Wickers wins $5 on scratch off lottery ticket. City rejoices.

bigfoot
07-17-2005, 09:12 PM
Cubs Nearing WildCard Berth!

Sox still draw few fans despite record(pg 11 beneath tire ad)

Wirtzsucks19
07-17-2005, 09:23 PM
i have tuesday's Headline!

FEW SOX FANS COME TO HALF PRICE GAME. THE FEY THAT WERE THERE HAD NO INTENTIONS TO WATCH THE GAME BUT TO BOO AT FUTURE ALL-STAR.

soxjim
07-17-2005, 09:29 PM
ZABRAN0 DRIVES IN 2 AS THE RED HOT CUBS TAKE 3 OF 4 FROM THE PIRATES.
WOODS CAPTURES THE BRITISH OPEN

Sox sweep a struggling Indians team

Hitmen77
07-17-2005, 10:40 PM
Face It, We Hate the Sox
- Ligue tries to go through Jewel express lane with more than 10 items. Details on pg. 2 with photos of Gamboa attack.
- Car accident occurs 3 blocks from whatever they call Comiskey park these days. Area is not safe for anyone.
- Sox aide in destruction of economy by selling tickets at half price.
- Cubs hammer tough NL Central foe and begin 2nd half dominance over all of baseball.
- Ronnie "Woo Woo" Wickers wins $5 on scratch off lottery ticket. City rejoices.

That's funny!

Ron Karkovice
07-17-2005, 10:44 PM
i have tuesday's Headline!

FEW SOX FANS COME TO HALF PRICE GAME. THE FEY THAT WERE THERE HAD NO INTENTIONS TO WATCH THE GAME BUT TO BOO AT FUTURE ALL-STAR.

its too early for tuesdays!:o:

Hitmen77
07-17-2005, 10:52 PM
CUBS POUND PIRATES, FACE TALENTED REDS NEXT.
- Wrigley Shrine Sold Out Yet Again. Fans Brave Sweltering Heat.
- Santo Movie Ratings 3x Higher than Sox Game Ratings
Page 2: Sox May Be in 1st, But Cubs Are 1st in Hearts of Chicagoans.
Page 3: MLB Roundup: Chicago (AL) Defeats Tribe.

Special Note to Readers: In 2 weeks a special Sunday pullout section commemorating the 8th anniversary of the white flag trade. We will be featuring interviews with former 3rd and 4th generation Sox fans who became Cub fans after that fateful trade. Read how these fans now bleed Cubbie blue and show no interest in the fortunes of their former favorite team.

miker
07-18-2005, 11:24 AM
Tribune Columnist Commits Treason

http://chicagosports.chicagotribune...cs-home-utility (http://chicagosports.chicagotribune.com/sports/columnists/cs-050716morrisseycol,1,6415995.column?coll=cs-home-utility)

(And don't tell me they wouldn't exploit one of their own...)

billyvsox
07-18-2005, 10:33 PM
Cubs WIN!!! Acquire Stud Jody Gerut from Tribe (believed to be the next Billy Williams).


Sox nip lowly Tigers. Release fan favorite Shingy.

GoSox2K3
07-18-2005, 10:48 PM
Cubs Defeat Talented Reds. Chicago Playoff Hopes Still Alive.

Trib Columnist Morrisey Fired

Sox Hang on to Beat 4th Place Tigers in Rare Home Sellout.

Maggs Returns to Chicago
- Tigers star almost signed with Cubs
- Maggs thanks Cub fans for their support*


(* Don't laugh, the Trib actually said something like this when Maggs signed with the Tigers!)

chisoxmike
07-18-2005, 11:11 PM
FORMER CUB AND FAN, CITY FAVORITE SAMMY SOSA PASSES JUICER ON ALL-TIME HR LIST.

DEREK LEE HOMERS AGAIN!

CUBS CONTINUE TO RIP THROUGH TOUGH NL CENTRAL.

ALMOST CUB MAGGLIO ORDONEZ COMES TO DIRTY, OVER CROWED CELL, GETS BOOED BY CRAZED, JEALOUS FANS.

Sox come through with longball, is the small over? Will this mean downhill slide for AL Chicago team?

cheeses_h_rice
07-18-2005, 11:26 PM
RED HOT CUBBIES NIPPING AT HEELS OF PLAYOFFS
Triple Crown Almost a Certainty for Cubbie Slugger Derrek Lee
Indians Can't Miss Stud Gerut Acquired by Genius Hendry for Stretch Run
Ex-Sox Ordonez Unloads on Sox Pitching, full game story p. 14

TommyJohn
07-19-2005, 08:07 AM
Trib Columnist Morrisey Fired

Sox Hang on to Beat 4th Place Tigers in Rare Home Sellout.

Maggs Returns to Chicago
- Tigers star almost signed with Cubs
- Maggs thanks Cub fans for their support*


(* Don't laugh, the Trib actually said something like this when Maggs signed with the Tigers!)





Classic! Any one of these would get my vote for post of the week.

Baby Fisk
07-19-2005, 08:17 AM
RED HOT CUBBIES NIPPING AT HEELS OF PLAYOFFS
Triple Crown Almost a Certainty for Cubbie Slugger Derrek Lee
Indians Can't Miss Stud Gerut Acquired by Genius Hendry for Stretch Run
Ex-Sox Ordonez Unloads on Sox Pitching, full game story p. 14

Oh man, this one was awesome. :rolling:

eriqjaffe
07-19-2005, 08:24 AM
CUBS PULL TO WITHIN 13.5 WITH CONVINCING VICTORY OVER REDS.
PODSEDNIK HOME RUN DROUGHT CONTINUES AS SOX MANAGE TO SQUEAK BY ORDONEZ, TIGERS (FULL STORY, PAGE 26).

downstairs
07-19-2005, 08:32 AM
Cubs Slaughter 5-time World Champs Cincy Reds
ATL, PHI just barely holding on to playoff lead

Gerut Era Begins in Chicago

Other Chicago MLB Scores:
DET 5 CHI(AL) 7

downstairs
07-19-2005, 08:36 AM
Special Tribune Sunday Feature:

CHI(AL) World Series Hopes Still Alive:
Will They Throw This One Also?

miker
07-19-2005, 11:05 AM
You know, lampooning the Cubune this way is almost too easy, too obvious...
...but it still cracks me up!!! :D:

mr_genius
07-19-2005, 12:29 PM
D Lee passes 30, 2 HR GAME!

Yankees surge

Bitter Drunks Boo Ordonez

maurice
07-19-2005, 01:07 PM
Predicted headline:
Sox come through with longball, is the small over? Will this mean downhill slide for AL Chicago team?

Actual Cub-Times (http://www.suntimes.com/output/sports/cst-spt-sox19.html) headline:
Small-Ball Script Takes a Big Hit

:rolleyes:

eriqjaffe
07-19-2005, 02:53 PM
HERNANDEZ SHAKY IN RETURN, SOX WILL PROBABLY LOSE EVERY GAME FOR THE REST OF THE SEASON. GO CUBBIES!
JOE CREDE, OF ALL PEOPLE, HITS A HOME RUN. GO FIGURE. FULL COVERAGE, PAGE SEVENTYLEVEN.

ChiSoxPatF
07-19-2005, 03:12 PM
Surging Cubs Pound Dangerous Reds - Wild Card All But Clinched

White Sox Narrowly Escape Humilating Defeat Against Lowly Tigers - Experts Compare 2005 Sox to 2001 Mariners

So.ILSoxFan
07-19-2005, 04:28 PM
HERNANDEZ SHAKY IN RETURN, SOX WILL PROBABLY LOSE EVERY GAME FOR THE REST OF THE SEASON. GO CUBBIES!
JOE CREDE, OF ALL PEOPLE, HITS A HOME RUN. GO FIGURE. FULL COVERAGE, PAGE SEVENTYLEVEN.



:roflmao:

Hangar18
07-19-2005, 04:32 PM
Cubs on Fire ...pound Reds
Tigers lose to Chicago
Thomas sulks...Clubhouse in shambles

chisox06
07-19-2005, 06:15 PM
WHITE SOX SELL OUT 1/2 PRICE NIGHT
-Declining Southside crack prices lead to spike in sox attendence
-Brooks inaugural "5 o'clock free crack giveaway" a huge hit on southside

CubsfansareDRUNK
07-19-2005, 07:49 PM
Page 2: Sox May Be in 1st, But Cubs Are 1st in Hearts of Chicagoans.

hahhahahahahahaha

lbtigerfan
07-19-2005, 08:03 PM
way to make it to 200

SoxSpeed22
07-19-2005, 08:22 PM
:tomatoaward:tomatoaward
Keep this thread up all year.

TommyJohn
07-19-2005, 08:27 PM
:tomatoaward :tomatoaward

ANTI-CUB THREAD ON ANTI-CUB SITE WINS DOUBLE TOMATO AWARD

chisoxmike
07-19-2005, 09:47 PM
Predicted headline:


Actual Cub-Times (http://www.suntimes.com/output/sports/cst-spt-sox19.html) headline:


:rolleyes:

I saw that this morning. :rolleyes:

whitesoxfan
07-19-2005, 09:53 PM
PAINFULL LOSS
Ordonez helps Tigers beat other Chicago team. More inside.

Cubs destroy Reds for 2nd night in a row; playoffs next.

soltrain21
07-19-2005, 09:56 PM
Zambrano Excited for G-Mail invite.

YEAH BITCHES! THE SOX LOST! TAKE THAT SOX FANS!

Whiney Fans Complain about Bias.

Cowhead418
07-19-2005, 09:58 PM
SELIG RELEASES NEW RULE
- ATTENDENCE WILL NOW COUNT
- EVERY GAME THAT IS SOLD OUT PUTS HALF A WIN IN STANDINGS
- CUBS NOW BEST TEAM IN BASEBALL
MORE DETAILS INSIDE

SOX LOSE ONE CONSECUTIVE GAMES IN A ROW. COULD THEY COLLAPSE? DETAILS PAGE 47 (Editor's Note: There is no page 47 hahahahahahahaha)

chisoxmike
07-19-2005, 10:03 PM
CUBS MAGICAL SEASON CONTINUES!


SOX CAN'T HIT OR PITCH IN UGLY, DEMORALIZING LOSS.

Wirtzsucks19
07-19-2005, 10:46 PM
SOX LOSE ONE CONSECUTIVE GAMES IN A ROW.



DOWNSLIDE BEGINS NOW. TIME FOR SOX FANS TO BE BROUGHT BACK TO REALITY.

nedlug
07-19-2005, 10:46 PM
CUBS CONTINUE DOMINANCE OF MOST IMPROVED TEAM IN THE MAJORS
Revamped Hall-of-Famer Griffey completely shut out, and God wins another game
Beginning of the End: Chicago White Sox continue one-game offensive drought... just like the 2001 Mariners did in one game.
Seattle Mariners, the 1983 White Sox: More interesting comparisons to this year's White Sox, p. 15

SomebodyToldMe
07-19-2005, 10:53 PM
ChiSox in a Terrible One Game Slide

ChiSox "All-Star" Podsednik STILL Homerless.
We Look Over the Lee/Podsednik Trade Based Only on Power Numbers

TimoandAaron
07-19-2005, 11:01 PM
ChiSox in a Terrible One Game Slide

ChiSox "All-Star" Podsednik STILL Homerless.
We Look Over the Lee/Podsednik Trade Based Only on Power Numbersyou forgot to add STILL homerless in the Amereican league. that would make it better.

Hitmen77
07-19-2005, 11:09 PM
Cubs Hottest Team in Baseball
Don't Look Now Sox Fans, But Cubs Have Equaled Sox 2nd Half Record. Overrated Sox and Underrated Cubs both 5-1 Since Break.


Tigers Go For Series Win Tomorrow Afternoon at Soulless Cell.


Sox Attendance Blip Tied to Heavily Discounted Tickets

cheeses_h_rice
07-20-2005, 12:07 AM
Sox Attendance Blip Tied to Heavily Discounted Tickets, Desperate Appeals to Special Interest Groups (the Navy, Teachers), and Absence of Games at Wrigley This Week

Fixed it for you.

santo=dorf
07-20-2005, 12:13 AM
Fixed it for you.

That Brian Peppers sig is FREAKY!!!!!!!!!:whiner:

SomebodyToldMe
07-20-2005, 12:52 AM
That Brian Peppers sig is FREAKY!!!!!!!!!:whiner:

Heck yeah it is. When I first saw that picture awhile ago I literally jumped and missed a heartbeat.

CubsfansareDRUNK
07-20-2005, 12:58 AM
That Brian Peppers sig is FREAKY!!!!!!!!!:whiner:

To quote the dude "Jesus!"

Mr. White Sox
07-20-2005, 01:19 AM
Here they come!
Cubs, Twins win; catch up to rivals Domination over "The Humongous Red Machine" Continues


Is this it?
Sox' "Strokes" cease, Contreras crumbles, collapse imminent

StillMissOzzie
07-20-2005, 02:13 AM
CUBS RED HOT SINCE BREAK, PULL WITHIN 3* (OF A SINGLE DIGIT MARGIN ) OF DIVISION LEAD (AND WITHIN 4 OF A WILD CARD BERTH )


SOX SKID HITS 1

SMO
:gulp:

Hitmen77
07-20-2005, 08:31 AM
Fixed it for you.

Perfect!

Cowhead418
07-20-2005, 08:40 AM
CUBBIES RULE!!! THEY ARE REEEEED-HOT! WATCH OUT NL HERE WE COME!

SOX LOSE TO PATHETIC TIGERS TEAM! SUCK IT SOX FANS! LOLOLOLOLOLOL @ SOX FANS.

Hitmen77
07-20-2005, 08:45 AM
And a real article headline from the Cubune today (drum roll please.....)
Former Sox Fan Changes His Allegiance


Hard to separate our "fake" headline from the real Cubune ones, huh?
The article is about new Cubs sensation Jody Gerut. Despite the headline, Gerut says nothing in the article about no longer being a Sox fan. You know what the headline would read if a lifelong Cub fan joined the Sox:

Die-Hard Cub Fan Joins Sox. His job is to play for the Sox, but his heart is still with the Cubbies.

eriqjaffe
07-20-2005, 08:49 AM
CUBS FINALLY FIGURE OUT HOW TO BEAT TEAMS IN NL CENTRAL BASEMENT

IF PODSEDNIK HAD ACTUALLY HIT A HOME RUN, THE SOX MIGHT HAVE HAD A CHANCE. 1 COLUMN BLURB, PAGE 8.

Hangar18
07-20-2005, 08:49 AM
Prior masterful, dominates Reds
Messiah tosses best pitched game in decades

Sox coming apart .... skid hits 1

Gerut happy to be a Cub
Says rumors of his being a Sox Fan false
Turn inside for more stories of the newest Cub!

Cubs on way to Playoffs

TornLabrum
07-20-2005, 08:56 AM
:knue

"It's funny because it's true."

Hitmen77
07-20-2005, 09:07 AM
Gerut happy to be a Cub
Says rumors of his being a Sox Fan false

They actually call him a FORMER Sox fan in their headline today!

Cowhead418
07-20-2005, 09:09 AM
CUBS CONTINUE DOMINANCE OF MOST IMPROVED TEAM IN THE MAJORS
Revamped Hall-of-Famer Griffey completely shut out, and God wins another game
Beginning of the End: Chicago White Sox continue one-game offensive drought... just like the 2001 Mariners did in one game.
Seattle Mariners, the 1983 White Sox: More interesting comparisons to this year's White Sox, p. 15
The Cubune actually compared the 2001 Mariners to the Sox today.:rolleyes:

Hangar18
07-20-2005, 09:10 AM
They actually call him a FORMER Sox fan in their headline today!

Really? Why doesnt that surprise me ......

Hangar18
07-20-2005, 09:17 AM
Cubs rolling towards Playoffs!
Coming Friday: Cubs Playoff March preview and who we need to
acquire to make this happen

Johnny Damon says Wrigley Field great
Longs for chance to play at Wrigley

Are Sox really #1? Chicagoans think otherwise
Fans say Cubs have more history, tradition and charm

Ligue applies for job

SoxFan78
07-20-2005, 09:22 AM
2-OUT PLUNDER!!!!!

Sadly, this is the real headline.

ChiSoxPatF
07-20-2005, 10:13 AM
Johnny Damon says Wrigley Field great
Longs for chance to play at Wrigley


:rolling:

Sadly, I'm pretty sure we'll actually see something like that sometime this season.

chuckn98229
07-20-2005, 10:24 AM
CUBS WORLD SERIES PARADE ROUTE REVEALED - Moronotti to be parade marshall

Somber Sox Begin Slide - Empty seats throughout the Cell

mr_genius
07-20-2005, 12:35 PM
VIVA EL MAGGLIO, VIVA EL MAGGLIOOOO!
Ordonez says white sox fluke; Jim Morrissey agrees p.67

CUBS PUT IT ALL TOGETHER; DOMINATE
p.78-67

KEN HARRELSON DRUNK IN BOOTH?
Yes. p.72

Hangar18
07-20-2005, 01:12 PM
KEN HARRELSON DRUNK IN BOOTH?
Yes. p.72



Harrelson Drunk in Booth
Sources say hes thinking of copying Cubs 7th inning tradition

Foulke You
07-20-2005, 05:38 PM
SOX DROP 5 OF LAST 6 HOME GAMES
Lack of Fan Support Cited as Reason as Sox continue to slide

SomebodyToldMe
07-20-2005, 05:58 PM
CHI(AL) Finally Back to Reality After Losing More Than 30 Games!

Cowhead418
07-20-2005, 09:16 PM
RED-HOT CUBS HIT A SPEED BUMP ON ROAD TO PLAYOFFS
- LEE HITS 31ST HOMERUN. TRIPLE CROWN A CERTAINTY
- OPTIMISTIC WOOD ON TO CONTINUE SUCCESS IN SIMULATED GAMES - HOPES TO BECOME FIRST SIMULATED 20-GAME WINNER

SLIDING TOWARD 2ND
-GUZMAN, SOX TAKE A COLLECTIVE DUMP ON THE PLAYING FIELD AS THEY CONTINUE THEIR LOSING WAYS. TWINS NOW ONLY 11 GAMES BACK

Chisox003
07-20-2005, 09:27 PM
RED-HOT CUBS HIT A SPEED BUMP ON ROAD TO PLAYOFFS
- LEE HITS 31ST HOMERUN. TRIPLE CROWN A CERTAINTY
- OPTIMISTIC WOOD ON TO CONTINUE SUCCESS IN SIMULATED GAMES - HOPES TO BECOME FIRST SIMULATED 20-GAME WINNER

SLIDING TOWARD 2ND
-GUZMAN, SOX TAKE A COLLECTIVE DUMP ON THE PLAYING FIELD AS THEY CONTINUE THEIR LOSING WAYS. TWINS NOW ONLY 11 GAMES BACK

This thread is great...Let me try

Up and Coming Reds Eek Out Victory Against Surging Cubs, 9-3
-Wood needs a rest as early preperation for Northside playoffs begin
-"Gerut better 'equipped' than Dubois to play in heat," Baker

The Southside Slide
-Sox rocked by Ordonez and company in front of home crowd of 5,000 plus, Twins soar to another victory

cheeses_h_rice
07-20-2005, 09:45 PM
HOME DISADVANTAGE?
Tribune Statistical Analysis Shows White Sox Missing Playoffs If They Continue to Lose 6 out of 7 at Home
Stumbling Sox Now Have to Face World Series Champs -- Can They At Least Win 1 This Weekend?

SomebodyToldMe
07-20-2005, 09:46 PM
-"Gerut better 'equipped' than Dubois to play in heat," Baker


HAHAHAHA
That one's great!

alohafri
07-20-2005, 10:20 PM
Sox Lose Two In A Row: It's Over

Wood Fine, Just Wanted Day Off

A_ROW33
07-21-2005, 08:43 AM
CUB TO BE KEN GRIFFEY JR SOMEHOW MANAGES TO RIP ONE OFF WOOD

How does anyone Hit Kerry Wood? oh they don't. p3

Exclusive inside look at simulated games, they key to the cubs magical season. p5

Lance Armstrong leads tour again. p7

Wimpy Whitesox curl up and die in the rain, lose two in a row to lowly tigers. p28

Hangar18
07-21-2005, 09:31 AM
Wood leaves early, Courageous Cubs almost win
Team says he had a cramp, ok for playoff push
Playoff push continues

Red Sox make historic trip to Chicago ....for 2nd time
Bosox second trip lacks luster of initial historic visit in June
Red Sox to bring own water/food; Say taste is worse on south side

Johnny Damon loves Wrigleyville
Says south side isnt as "fun" as north side
Damon ranks the best bars on Clark St

Tigers pummell SOX
Losing streak continues

SoxFan78
07-21-2005, 09:45 AM
Red Sox visit Chicago again!

Thousands of die hard Cubbie Blue fans camped outside Wrigley this morning for this historic series hoping for their chance to get some SRO tickets.

maurice
07-21-2005, 10:50 AM
Red alert on radar
Guillen, White Sox brace for champions
Tigers rain on Sox parade, win 2 of 3
Ordonez has 7 hits in series
Guillen defends the AL Central

And, in other news:
Maddux strikes big blow for short right-handers
Special status awaits Maddux

maurice
07-21-2005, 10:55 AM
Sox hit surprising rough patch at Cell
Home is where the struggles are for the White Sox, who have lost five of their last six games at their ballpark. . . .

[It's amazing the kind of BS storylines you can generate by manipulating the data to conveniently exclude the 2 Sox sweeps this month -- one at home and the other on the road.]

kj.hayes
07-21-2005, 03:51 PM
Red Sox visit Chicago again!

Thousands of die hard Cubbie Blue fans camped outside Wrigley this morning for this historic series hoping for their chance to get some SRO tickets.

This was great!

Hitmen77
07-21-2005, 04:27 PM
On to St. Louis! Chicago's attention turns to Cubs/Cards Series this weekend.
- Cubbie Sweep Can Put Them with Striking Distance of Baseball's Best Team.


Red Sox in Chicago
- Fans who can't make the trip to St. Louis can see Chicago's other favorite baseball team, the Boston Red Sox, at the sterile ballmall.
- Inflated attendance expected at Cell this weekend as Red Sox fans and Cub fans flock to see the world champs.
- Somber White Sox Await Ass-Whipping by BoSox.
- Red Sox Players Wish They Were At Wrigley. The Cell Makes Them Feel Empty, Depressed, and Unsafe.