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mike squires
07-27-2004, 05:03 PM
I got an e-mail joke from an old high school friend (went to prom with her non the less) The old, teacher askes the students if they are brewers fans all raise hand except one and says she's a cub fan...anyway it's a slam against the sox. anyone have any good ones against the cubs. it would be much appreciated...

wood28
07-27-2004, 05:06 PM
A first grade teacher explains to her class that she's a Cubs fan. She asks her students to raise their hands if they're Cubs fans, too. Not really knowing what a Cubs fan is but wanting to be just like their teacher, the students launch their hands into the air like fleshy fireworks. There is, however, one exception: A girl named Cathy doesn't go along with the crowd.

The teacher asks her why she's decided to be different. "Because I'm not a Cubs fan," Cathy says.
"Then what are you?" asks the teacher.
"Why, I'm proud to be a Sox fan," boasts the little girl. The teacher is a little perturbed now, her face slightly red. She asks Cathy why she's a Sox fan. "Well, my mom and dad are Sox fans, so I'm a Sox fan, too."

The teacher is now very angry. "That's no reason!" she says loudly. "What if your mom was a moron, and your dad was a moron. What would you be then?"

Cathy pauses, then smiles. "Why, then," Cathy says, "I'd be a Cubs fan."

Blob
07-27-2004, 07:11 PM
You can take pack of cigarettes and take off the clear platsic cellophane on the outside. Put it down on a flat surface standing up and ask them whats this? When they guess tell them its the Cubs World Series Trophy case!!! Better in person than trying to type it out.

he_gone_89
07-27-2004, 07:21 PM
i dunno any cub jokes but i do have a baseball joke


what would you get if Darryl Strawberry were to now hit a home run???


jack and coke:gulp: :D:

SoxFan76
07-27-2004, 07:22 PM
You can take pack of cigarettes and take off the clear platsic cellophane on the outside. Put it down on a flat surface standing up and ask them whats this? When they guess tell them its the Cubs World Series Trophy case!!! Better in person than trying to type it out.
That has to be hard to do when you're a Sox fan. And I'm pretty sure the Cubs have more NL pennants than the Sox do AL pennants.

Nick@Nite
07-27-2004, 07:29 PM
Question: What's the difference between a Cub fan and a sack of manure?

Answer: The sack.

:b&b
"Heh, heh, heh... he said sack"

jenmcm76
07-27-2004, 07:46 PM
Five Chicago sports fans were climbing a mountain one day. Each was a fan of a different Chicago team and each proclaimed to be the most loyal of all fans to their team. As they climbed higher, they argued as to which one of them was the most loyal of all.

They continued to argue all the way up the mountain, and finally as they reached the top, the Blackhawk fan hurled himself off the mountain, shouting, "This is for the Hawks!!!" as he fell to his doom.

Not wanting to be outdone, the Bulls fan threw himself off the mountain, proclaiming, "This is for the greatest team of the 90's!!!"

Seeing this, the Bears fan walked over and shouted, "This is for DA COACH!!!", and leapt to his death.

The two remaining fans just looked at each other in stunned silence. After a minute, the Sox Fan shouted, "This is for everyone on the South Side!!!" and pushed the Cubs fan off of the mountain.

SoxFan76
07-27-2004, 07:52 PM
Five Chicago sports fans were climbing a mountain one day. Each was a fan of a different Chicago team and each proclaimed to be the most loyal of all fans to their team. As they climbed higher, they argued as to which one of them was the most loyal of all.

.......

The two remaining fans just looked at each other in stunned silence. After a minute, the Sox Fan shouted, "This is for everyone on the South Side!!!" and pushed the Cubs fan off of the mountain.
:) Thats a good one!

Nick@Nite
07-27-2004, 07:52 PM
. :rolling:

PaleHoseGeorge
07-27-2004, 08:06 PM
What did the first Cubs fan say to the second Cubs fan?
How much to park inside your garage?

What did the third Cubs fan say to the fourth Cubs fan?
What's the score?

Later, what did the fifth Cubs fan say to the sixth Cubs fan?
Did Sammy hit one out?

Later, what did the seventh Cubs fan say to the eighth Cubs fan?
Nothing, he was passed out.

Later still, what did the ninth Cubs fan say to the tenth Cubs fan?
Wait here a minute, I'm gonna pee on this garage door.

And what did all ten Cubs fans say at the office the next day?
That's the way baseball ought to be!

:cool:

CubsfansareDRUNK
07-27-2004, 08:57 PM
Ive posted MANY cubs "suck" jokes throughout this website..but i dont really feel like digging them out. Here's my favorite one:


On a recent tour of the United States, the Pope took a couple of days off his itinerary to visit the Florida coastline on an impromptu sightseeing trip.

His 4x4 Pope-mobile was driving along the beautiful shoreline when there was an enormous commotion heard just off the headland.

They rushed to see what it was and upon approaching the scene, the Pope noticed in the water a hapless man wearing a Chicago Cubs baseball jersey, struggling frantically to free himself from the jaws of a huge shark.

At that moment a speedboat containing three men wearing White Sox jerseys roared into view from around the point. Immediately, one of the men took aim and fired a harpoon into the shark's ribs, immobilizing it instantly. The other two reached out and pulled the Cubs fan from the water and then, using long clubs, beat the shark to death.

They bundled the bleeding, semiconscious man into the boat along with the dead shark and then prepared for a hasty retreat when they heard frantic shouting from the shore.

It was the Pope summoning them to the beach. After they reached the shore, the Pope praised them for the rescue and said, I give you my blessing for your brave actions. I had heard that there was bitter hatred between the people of south and north sides of Chicago, but now I have seen with my own eyes this is not true. I can see that your society is a truly enlightened example of true harmony and could serve as a model on which others could follow."

He blessed them all and drove off in a cloud of dust. As he departed, the harpooner asked the others, "Who was that?"

"That," one answered, "that was the Holy Father, His Holiness the Pope, the head of the Roman Catholic Church and the spiritual leader of millions of faithful Christians around the world."

"Well," the harpooner replied, "He doesn't seem to know diddley about shark fishing. Is the bait holding up okay or do we need to get another one?"

SOXSINCE'70
07-28-2004, 08:12 AM
The sCrUBS are their own joke.:rolling: :rolling:

Fungo
07-28-2004, 09:19 AM
3 baseball fans are walking along some railroad tracks when they come across the naked torso of a murdered woman. The Sox fan says, "We gotta call the police, but let's give her her dignity first." So the Sox fan takes off his hat an puts it on top of her left breast. The Cardinals fan says, "Agreed," and removes his hat and puts it over her right breast. The Cub fan calls the police on his cellphone, gives the police the location of the body, and does what the other two baseball fans did, removes his hat, and places it over her vagina.

The cop shows up and says, "What do we have here?", and picks up the White Sox hat, looks under it, and places it back down. The cop then picks up the Cardinals hat, looks under it, and places it down. The cop then picks up the Cubs hat, looks under it, places it down, looks under it, places it down, looks under it once again, and places it down.....

At this point the Cubs fan screams, "What's the matter with you? Don't you have any sense of decency?" The cop stands up, looks at the Cub fan, and says, "Sir..... we have a problem here." The Cub fans says, "What's that?" The cop replies, "Usually when I look under a Cubs hat I see an @sshole under it."

Etownsox13
07-28-2004, 10:01 AM
What happens when a bunch of gay guys start flipping over cars?


Answer: I dunno, and we'll never know cause the Cubs aren't gonna win the World Series.

bennyw41
07-28-2004, 12:24 PM
Cubs jokes are just recycled "any team: jokes. Orignality people!!!