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cheeses_h_rice
08-14-2001, 10:58 AM
:moron


...sob...sob...it's all because of that stupid, icky Enron Field that the Flubbies lost! Houston stinks! They were probably changing the outfield dimensions every time the Flubbies came to the plate!

I'm digging a tunnel out the back on this whole Flubbie love thing....

Sam-ME is still electric, though. I love Sam-ME.



http://www.suntimes.com/output/mariotti/cst-spt-jay14.html

Moses_Scurry
08-14-2001, 12:16 PM
:moron


WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!
Friggin Astros suck!!! You guys suck!!! I wanna go home!!!

Foulke You
08-14-2001, 12:22 PM
How can he possibly criticize Enron when his precious Flubbies play at the original bandbox of baseball, Wrigley Field? How can he call the Cubs fans the "most tortured in all of professional sports" when most Cubs fans seem fat, dumb, and happy at Wrigley Field all the time? Where was his article on how the Metrodome screwed the Sox? Oh wait....I forgot, it's Jay Moronotti!!

cheeses_h_rice
08-14-2001, 12:45 PM
I agree. If any fans in Chicago are "tortured," it's gotta be Sox fans, given how biased the media coverage is in this city. But, there goes Jay, adding more "mystique" to the Flubbies' history by somehow making it seem like the 38,000 losers who pack the park day-in, day-out are actually worked up over how the team does, in any given year.

And as for Enron, I'm sorry, but didn't both the Astros and Flubs get a chance to bat an equal amount of innings in the exact same ballpark, with the exact same dimensions, last night? I could've sworn that was the case.

Chisox353014
08-14-2001, 12:57 PM
Yeah, I just saw that. It's too hilarious! He's so frustrated that he resorted to using a near-cuss word in his column. He sounds like a second-grader with his list of excuses:

Frigging Houston. What has this humidity-smothered, strip-mall-tacky town ever done to deserve a quality baseball franchise?
Well, they put a quality team on the field 3 times more often than the Flubs do for one thing...

He also likes the unbalanced schedule. Of all quirky devices, that may be the Cubs' undoing, forcing them to go head-to-head with the Astros more often.
Gasp! you mean the Cubs actually have to play a good team in their division? That's not fair!!!! I wanna play Pittsburgh some more!!!

A big, old, annoying train chugs along a track above left field, making shrill choo-choo noises just about every time the hometown boys score.
If that stupid choo-choo train would have shut up, then Jason Bere could have concentrated and been awesome!!

Here, inside baseball's notorious Wiffle-ball den, with short-as-advertised porches you and I could conquer, heaven help the ballclub that tries to win with traditionally noble traits such as pitching. Feel free to worry, Cubdom. It is that time, I'm afraid. Whoever said good pitching always beats good hitting hasn't been to downtown Houston lately.
It's not noble to hit the ball! Unless you're Slammin' Sammy-then all your flyballs should be zingers! It's not fair that Houston has a bunch of good hitters! Their hits shouldn't count cause their field is too small! I mean, you and I could hit zingers at Ten-Run Field!

:moron
"Stupid Friggin Astros..WAAAHHHH!!... Houston..Ten-run field...choochootrain ...mumble ..mumble..sniffle..WAHHHHH!! ...sniffle... I love Sammy..mumble...mumble ...Tiger Woods....stupid Houston..blah..blah blah....I'm outta here!!"
*leaps off Cub bandwagon*

Iwritecode
08-14-2001, 12:59 PM
Originally posted by cheeses_h_rice
And as for Enron, I'm sorry, but didn't both the Astros and Flubs get a chance to bat an equal amount of innings in the exact same ballpark, with the exact same dimensions, last night? I could've sworn that was the case.

Actually, the Stos' didn't get to bat in the ninth... :)

I was listening to the radio last night when Sosa hit that "rocketshot" to the warning track. Their radio announcers are almost as bad as Chimp. The one guy was yelling "oh yea!" up until it was caught. I had a pretty good chuckle about that one. Then they talked about if it were only 10 feet to the left it would've been gone. Horseshoes and hand grenades guys...

Paulwny
08-14-2001, 01:00 PM
ahhhh.... I'm sorry guys but weren't we all complaining about the Baggie Dome?

Iwritecode
08-14-2001, 01:03 PM
Originally posted by Chisox353014
Here, inside baseball's notorious Wiffle-ball den, with short-as-advertised porches you and I could conquer, heaven help the ballclub that tries to win with traditionally noble traits such as pitching. Feel free to worry, Cubdom. It is that time, I'm afraid. Whoever said good pitching always beats good hitting hasn't been to downtown Houston lately.

You know, if you don't let them hit the ball in the first place, it's hard for them to hit homeruns...

:burly
I think I could teach them a thing or two about that...

Fisk Fan
08-14-2001, 01:04 PM
"But (Sosa) continues to be a solo act, receiving litle help from the impotent Eric Young in the leadoff spot."


If anyone would know about the Flubs' ability to "get it up", then Moronotti is the guy.

What a flamer!

Iwritecode
08-14-2001, 01:06 PM
Originally posted by Paulwny
ahhhh.... I'm sorry guys but weren't we all complaining about the Baggie Dome?

Yeah, but we're fans and allowed to. We didn't write a column whining about it in a national publication. We're also not expected to be unbiased.

FarWestChicago
08-14-2001, 01:06 PM
Originally posted by Paulwny
ahhhh.... I'm sorry guys but weren't we all complaining about the Baggie Dome?

Paul, I think you're missing the point. This thread is about enjoying Moronotti's misery, not Enron. And, you didn't see Moronotti complaining about the Baggie Dome when we lost up there.

Paulwny
08-14-2001, 01:08 PM
You're right Code.

Paulwny
08-14-2001, 01:10 PM
You're right West, my heads in the sand.

Joel Perez
08-14-2001, 01:13 PM
Moronotti sounds like the little tyke that just had his cookies stolen...WWWWAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

Enron Field = Coors Field = Wrigley Field.

FarWestChicago
08-14-2001, 01:15 PM
Originally posted by Paulwny
You're right West, my heads in the sand.

Well, your point was correct, too. But I just broke my no Moronotti vow and went and read the article. I laughed so hard I almost had tears running down my cheecks. I love the part where he cries about the 'Stros keeping key players and grooming new ones, thusly remaining a consistently good team. Priceless!!

Paulwny
08-14-2001, 01:18 PM
I wonder if the Moron reads what he writes?

Chisox353014
08-14-2001, 01:25 PM
Well, your point was correct, too. But I just broke my no Moronotti vow and went and read the article. I laughed so hard I almost had tears running down my cheeks.

Yeah, this column is too funny not to read, even for the die-hard Moron hater.

love the part where he cries about the 'Stros keeping key players and grooming new ones, thusly remaining a consistently good team. Priceless!!

The best part is how he doesn't realize that he's just answered his own stupid question about "what did Houston do to deserve a winning team"! Well.... if you develop good players and keep them around awhile, then you deserve to be a good team, stupid! When was the last time the quick-fix "let's-try-signing-every-old-fart-veteran-in-baseball-and-see-if-anyone-sticks" Flubs did that? They don't deserve squat!

voodoochile
08-14-2001, 01:41 PM
Originally posted by cheeses_h_rice
And as for Enron, I'm sorry, but didn't both the Astros and Flubs get a chance to bat an equal amount of innings in the exact same ballpark, with the exact same dimensions, last night? I could've sworn that was the case.

Actually the flubbies got an extra atbat last night... :)

FarWestChicago
08-14-2001, 01:46 PM
The best part is how he doesn't realize that he's just answered his own stupid question about "what did Houston do to deserve a winning team"! Well.... if you develop good players and keep them around awhile, then you deserve to be a good team, stupid! When was the last time the quick-fix "let's-try-signing-every-old-fart-veteran-in-baseball-and-see-if-anyone-sticks" Flubs did that? They don't deserve squat!

That paragraph was worth printing and framing. He's so green with envy he doesn't even realize what a fool he's making of himself there. :)

PaleHoseGeorge
08-14-2001, 01:53 PM
Originally posted by FarWestChicago


Paul, I think you're missing the point. This thread is about enjoying Moronotti's misery, not Enron. And, you didn't see Moronotti complaining about the Baggie Dome when we lost up there.


Yep, that's it in a nutshell. We were victims of a division rival using their home ballpark to their own advantage and Moronotti had not a single word to say about it. I thought our team was from Chicago, too.

Ever since Moronotti got labeled "Kotex Boy" by XL, the last bit of objectivity has been drained from his coverage of the 2001 baseball season.

Somebody else make a good point, too. This Moronotti column sounds like the frontrunner is making his way to the edge of the Flubbie bandwagon. It will make it that much easier for him to jump off.

Who doubts he won't?

"Yes, but the chicks still dig me!"
:discomoron

FarWestChicago
08-14-2001, 01:59 PM
Somebody else make a good point, too. This Moronotti column sounds like the frontrunner is making his way to the edge of the Flubbie bandwagon. It will make it that much easier for him to jump off.

Undoubtedly, we'll see a September column where he declares himself a genius for knowing all along that the Flubs would fail. It should be quites amusing.

cheeses_h_rice
08-14-2001, 02:14 PM
Re: Sox fans slamming the Sh*tdome/Baggiedome vs. the Enron bashing...

There's a difference here. Moronotti's sole complaint is that Enron's dimensions are too small. Big deal; if someone just pokes the ball, it's gonna get out of there. This puts the Flubs at no more of a disadvantage than the Astros, even if the Astros play there all the time.

With the Baggiedome, the Sox were being screwed by balls being lost in the white ceiling backdrop, bang-off-the-concrete-floor "singles," and ground balls that whizzed past infielders who were playing too close to the batter. These are all traits that can be exploited by a team that plays 81 games a year there and is experienced in the way balls travel and is used to dealing with the ceiling, whereas with Enron, ANYONE can take advantage of its quirks who's played a few major league games -- after all, it just takes hitting the ball in the air.

But yeah, the fact that the Moron never once tried as desperately to defend the Sox when they had to play in Minny, coupled with today's hilarious article, says volumes.

Jerry_Manuel
08-14-2001, 03:36 PM
Originally posted by FarWestChicago
Undoubtedly, we'll see a September column where he declares himself a genius for knowing all along that the Flubs would fail. It should be quites amusing.


That sounds delicious!

rmusacch
08-14-2001, 03:54 PM
Originally posted by cheeses_h_rice
I agree. If any fans in Chicago are "tortured," it's gotta be Sox fans, given how biased the media coverage is in this city. But, there goes Jay, adding more "mystique" to the Flubbies' history by somehow making it seem like the 38,000 losers who pack the park day-in, day-out are actually worked up over how the team does, in any given year.

And as for Enron, I'm sorry, but didn't both the Astros and Flubs get a chance to bat an equal amount of innings in the exact same ballpark, with the exact same dimensions, last night? I could've sworn that was the case.

Yes to your question. Well actually, the Cubs got to bat nine times as opposed to the Astros eight times. :)

cheeses_h_rice
08-14-2001, 04:01 PM
Yes to your question. Well actually, the Cubs got to bat nine times as opposed to the Astros eight times.


:moron

Now you are just playing semantics. The fact is, the Astros obviously were using their home field to their advantage last night. I'm going to take my ball and jacks and go home now...

Fisk Fan
08-14-2001, 04:07 PM
That sounds delicious!


LMAO!