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Lip Man 1
08-24-2002, 09:07 PM
From Friday night's "Late Night With David Letterman"

Top 10 complaints of the average baseball player


10. Medical plan does not cover cryogenics
9. It's the grueling three-hour work day
8. Beer vendor seldom makes it to the dugout
7. Being called "out" is a crippling blow to one's self esteem
6. A certain percentage of us have to play for the Devil Rays
5. Mitt hand doesn't get any sun
4. It's 2002 and we still have to endure tiresome "We Will Rock You"
3. When a beach ball comes on the field, we want to keep it
2. People think strike is about money, when it's actually about a boatload of money
1. I think Mike Piazza's checking me out


Lip

RKMeibalane
08-24-2002, 11:05 PM
Originally posted by Lip Man 1
From Friday night's "Late Night With David Letterman"

Top 10 complaints of the average baseball player


10. Medical plan does not cover cryogenics
9. It's the grueling three-hour work day
8. Beer vendor seldom makes it to the dugout
7. Being called "out" is a crippling blow to one's self esteem
6. A certain percentage of us have to play for the Devil Rays
5. Mitt hand doesn't get any sun
4. It's 2002 and we still have to endure tiresome "We Will Rock You"
3. When a beach ball comes on the field, we want to keep it
2. People think strike is about money, when it's actually about a boatload of money
1. I think Mike Piazza's checking me out


Lip

Number six would be funnier if it read, "A certain percentage of us have to play for the Cubs."

WhiteSox = Life
08-25-2002, 03:46 AM
Why not just do a "Top 10 Complaints of a 2002 Chicago Cub"?

RedPinStripes
08-25-2002, 04:03 AM
Man, I don't know how that rumor started with Piazza, but he's catching hell for being gay weather he is or not.

WhiteSox = Life
08-25-2002, 04:21 AM
Originally posted by RedPinStripes
Man, I don't know how that rumor started with Piazza, but he's catching hell for being gay weather he is or not.

From what I remember, the story goes like this.

There was an article in SI, I believe, or some sort of quick headline a year ago or so, that said an ex-baseball player, who was gay, said, that there were MLB players who were gay and that 10, 20 years ago, a player saying he was gay would just kill him mentally and emotionally as he'd be hounded by the press, but the ex-player said that nowadays, there'd be no problem and the guy should come out of the closet.

Not much after that was published, Bobby Valentine said that if the gay player(s) should come out and that it would cause no problem. There'd be an immediate uproar, but it would die down eventually.

Well, some New York writer decided that since Valentine was standing up for the gay guy that he might be protecting one of his own players. And, from there, of course, the logical thinking is, a manager would definitely stand up for his star player, and boom, everybody started saying Piazza was gay.

That's the story in a nutshell pretty much, with some of the facts messed up probably, but that's how it went down.

RedPinStripes
08-25-2002, 05:14 AM
That's ****ed up! I feel for Piazza. I highly doubt he's gay. Eventhough we joke about it on the air all the time. :)

WhiteSox = Life
08-25-2002, 05:19 AM
I don't know. He does do all those 10-10-220 commercials, after all. :D:

He does those Claritin ones too though.

VeeckAsInWreck
08-25-2002, 08:04 AM
Originally posted by WhiteSox = Life
I don't know. He does do all those 10-10-220 commercials, after all. :D:


Hey! Any man who hangs out with ALF is not gay! After all ALF likes to eat cats and maybe Piazza too if you get what I am saying! :cool:

WhiteSox = Life
08-25-2002, 08:22 AM
Originally posted by VeeckAsInWreck


Hey! Any man who hangs out with ALF is not gay! After all ALF likes to eat cats and maybe Piazza too if you get what I am saying! :cool:

I may be a youngun', but I wasn't born yesterday! :D:

ALF was also born on Melmac, and maybe Piazza likes Melmac too if you get what I am saying!

Oh wait, I don't even know what I'm saying!

RedPinStripes
08-25-2002, 09:53 AM
Here's a few that "whitesox=life" and I put together just goofin around.

"Top 10 Compliants from Wrigley field."

10. Joe Girardi said he would hit 40 HR's if the Wrigley Field outfield walls weren't so damn far away
9. Sham-Me says he can't concentrate on playing defense since he can't stop thinking about the evil White Sox fan that ruined the ivy.

8. The minimum age for Wrigley security has gone up to 67 years old .
7.Impossible to walk around the clubhouse without stepping on a disposed-of needle
6.Corey Patterson is pissed he has to watch other planes fly overhead while he waits. He's used to seeing plenty of other stuff go over his head.
5.Sham-Me hasn't gotten the chance to meet his hero again (attach Barney and Sham pic)
4. sammy Sosa says he got his crabs from the ivy
3. Hundly wants a bottle of Vodka with every 6 pack of crappy grey t-shirts to soak up yesterday's waste.
2. from Steve Stone. " Great, i baby sat the drunk, now i have the idiot next year. Why me!!"

1.They can't get Mike Piazza out of WrigleyVille. He keeps missing the plane on every ride back to NY

Unregistered
08-25-2002, 12:22 PM
haha, i remember that big "gay piazza" scandal in NY. Specifically, the front page of the daily news solely devoted to the story that read in gigantic letters: "PIAZZA: IM NOT GAY.", right above a picture of piazza smiling like a punk with that stupid bleached hair... hilarious.

TheBigHurt
08-26-2002, 06:37 AM
Originally posted by WhiteSox = Life
Why not just do a "Top 10 Complaints of a 2002 Chicago Cub"?


:D: becuase the shows from NYC

WhiteSox = Life
08-26-2002, 07:48 AM
Originally posted by TheBigHurt



:D: becuase the shows from NYC

Yeah, I know. But, as you saw it was an open suggestion to other people to do one, so RPS and I decided to take care of it ourselves. Also, there are Chicago Cubs fans on every continent, in every crevice and pit on Earth. It wouldn't be too tough to find some Cubs fans in New York to write a Letterman Top 10. Odds are at least one of the show's writers is a Cubs fan.

Besides, all good shows take place in New York or California.

What do we have here in Chicago? Nothing but crap. Jerry Springer and Oprah.

BTW, sorry to all thoes Oprah-lovers out there. If I have offended you, sorry. Just forget this ever happened and go back to reading "O" or the book of the month. :D: