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WSI News - Totally Biased Game Recaps

Buehrle Baffles Baltimore Birds

July 18th vs. the Baltimore Orioles

KW's Daily Special:
Baltimore Fowl Served Au Jus
The White Sox win 4-3 against the hard-hitting Orioles on a drizzly day in Chicago.

Short Take:The Orioles can hit, but the White Sox can hit better, winning 4-3.

Kenny's Burger Joint offered wild game on the menu today, which the White Sox savored with Buehrle relish. The Sox beat the Baltimore Orioles 4-3 in a game that shouldn't been as close as it was, but those wild birds from the Maryland shore refused to go down without a fight. The threat of rain and a light drizzle provided a light gravy for the Sox in Kenny's kitchen.

But let's begin at the beginning. Mark Buehrle, everybody's favorite chef in Kenny's kitchen, started today's game and mixed pitches with his usual elan. As is his wont, Buehrle gave up 8 hits in 7-1/3 innings, but surrendered only 1 run. Giving up hits is the price of throwing strikes, and after watching Mark in this decade, that's a price Sox fans are happy to pay. The one run Buehrle allowed came in the Orioles' 2nd inning, when Ty Wiggington hit a leadoff double and advanced to third on a Melvin Mora groundout to first. Baltimore left-fielder Nolan Reimold lined another double, scoring Wiggington.

Not a cause for concern though, since Buehrle's skill at the griddle in Kenny's Joint is such that he can make even the wrong ingredients blend into a tasty dish. Mark only gave up that single run in his 7-1/3 innings, despite scattering those 8 hits. It's always a pleasure to watch a master at work.

The Sox scored all 4 of their runs in the 5th inning in a conga line of consecutive hits off orange-bird starter Brad Bergesen. Alexei Ramirez came to bat with 1 out and hit an unremarkable ground ball to short. The throw was clean, but firstbaseman Ty Wiggington couldn't hold on to the ball and it erroneously skipped into the dugout, putting Ramirez at second. Jermaine Dye followed that with his 21st home run, giving the Sox a 2-1 lead. Jim Thome followed that with a double off the right-field wall, which was followed by a Paul Konerko single that put runners on first and third. Next was A.J. Pierzynski with an RBI hit that scored Thome, who demonstrated his meritorious speed racing home from third base on A.J.'s single.

But, like Ron Popeil always says, there's more! Chris Getz came up next, and singled cleanly, but Konerko was inexplicably waved home where he was thrown out on a clean throw from leftfielder Nolan Reimold. As the 32,881 diners in Kenny's Joint scratched their heads wondering why on earth the galumphing Konerko was sent home on that play, young squire Gordon Beckham followed with his own single, scoring Pierzynski but also ending the inning as Chris Getz was thrown out at the plate on a strong throw by rightfielder Nick Markakis. When the music stopped, the score stood at White Sox 4, Baltimore Wild Birds 1.

Buehrle continued to cruise until the 8th inning, in which he gave up back-to-back singles to Cesar Izturis and Brian Roberts. After 1 out, Mark was relieved in Kenny's kitchen by Scott Linebrink, but not until the patrons at Kenny's Joint offered an ovation to Chef Buehrle. Linebrink didn't share Mark's skill, however, and gave up another single to Adam Jones, loading the bases. Linebrink was promptly replaced by Matt Thornton, who induced 2 more outs without allowing any of the Baltimore interlopers to score.

Enter the 9th inning, and it's time for last call in Kenny's Joint. Head bouncer Bobby Jenks was summoned, and though he announced to the intruding Baltimore orangeshirts that it was time to go, they refused to leave. Melvin Mora led off with a double, followed by an RBI single by Nolan Reimold. So that's they way they want it, eh? Jenks then struck out the next two hitters with his usual panache, but gave up a 2-out RBI single to the pesky Brian Roberts, scoring Reimold who had advanced to second on an unchallenged steal attempt. Bobby is trying our patience here, but he took a deep breath and got Nick Markakis to his a grounder to second, allowing Chris Getz to flip to Alexei Ramirez for the force on Roberts and mercifully end the game.

Preparing and serving wild game birds like orioles is not as simple as making chicken nuggets. Though the staff is skilled at Kenny's Burger Joint, it's tricky to get the dish done right. Fortunately for all of us, the staff under the expert direction of Head Chef Ozzie Guillen can quickly cover their mistakes and serve tasty victories like these. What's for dessert?

Critic's Corner:
I like watching Mark Buehrle get another win, but does Bobby Jenks really need all that drama?

submitted by tebman.

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Totally Biased Game Recaps

September 29... The Last (And Lost) Weekend

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September 22... At Least They Won't Clinch Here

September 18...Klubered, but Not Clobbered

September 16... Baltimore Blanked

September 10... Thrown Away

September 8... Anaheim Annihilation

September 3... Power Special

September 1... 18 Strikeouts Later, the White Sox Lose

August 30...Leaky Bullpen Bombed by Boston

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