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WSI News - Totally Biased Game Recaps

Konerko's Revenge

May 19th at the Addison Street Singles Club


Today's Sox Crew:
Antique Restoration Specialists
The Sox brought their tools to a decrepit North Side structure and did major renovations, mostly to the attitude of the occupants after suffering a workplace injury the day before.

Short Take:John Danks looked sharp and the Sox bats looked sharper as they beat the insufferable North Side Wall Gardeners 7-4.

To listen to the Fox network's gargling announcer, one would think this game was an epic clash of the titans. Not since Perseus vs. Medusa or even Godzilla vs. Mothra had there been such a contest as this evening's meeting of the not-quite-mighty White Sox and the re-re-rebuilding Chicago Cubs. We knew better, of course, but the good news is that the White Sox beat the North Side Social Club 7-4.

This game followed on the heels of Friday's game in which Paul Konerko took a brutal pitch to his face. Speaking of heels, North Side tonsorial specimen Jeff Samardzija had the brass to chirp from the Ursa Minors' dugout in that game when Philip Humber threw a message pitch behind Bryan LaHair. A lot of nerve, coming from the guy with a history of throwing at batters who hit homers, and after having done it again when he injured Sox icon Konerko. Pure class, just like the yokels who throw balls back on the field.

We can't avoid history but we need to live in the present. And tonight the present was very good for the White Sox. John Danks has had some sketchy starts this year but tonight in 6-1/3 innings he was on his game. He had a no-hitter going into the fifth and didn't look bad at the plate, getting two flyouts and a groundout (this being an interleague game played in a minor, er, National League park, the pitchers are required to hit). The Lake View Saloon Keepers were kept off balance throughout the game until the ninth in which they were graciously allowed some late batting practice.

But enough about those poseurs. Let's talk about the Sox: the scoring began early and was authoritative. Alejandro De Aza led off the first with a single against Ryan Dempster. Adam Dunn later walked, settig up Dayan Viciedo to get an RBI single, making it 1-0 after the first inning.

In the Sox' third, Dunn walked again and was standing by for Viciedo as he hit a homer into that zoo-cage basket in left field. That was followed poetically by a solo homer off A.J. Pierzynski's bat. Now it's 4-0 for the Major League team.

Several innings and scattered hits later, the Sox illustrated how to hit off a weak bullpen. Adam Dunn led off the eighth with his 13th home run of the year. A.J. Pierzynski later doubled, and Alex Rios was intentionally walked so that the Addison Street Pretenders could face Alexei Ramirez. Ramirez promptly singled A.J. home to make it 6-0. Eduardo Escobar then hit a grounder to third that went under the glove of Joe Mather, loading the bases. Blake Parker was brought in to pitch for the Tribune darlings and hurt himself after going 3-0 on De Aza. Michael Bowden then ascended the mound and threw ball four to De Aza, scoring Alex Rios. Nine batters for the Sox that inning, and it's 7-0.

Robin Ventura is a generous man. That quality was evident when he brought in Zach Stewart to pitch the bottom of the ninth with the Sox leading 7-0. Stewart served as a batting-practice pitcher, giving up four earned runs via two 2-run homers. But Ventura is also a patient man, and left Zach stewing until he notched three outs. The ballpark was half-empty at that point, as the Legion of Chad and Trixie adjourned to another of the many singles bars on Clark Street. The Sox fans who made up the remaining half of the attendees nodded in the satisfaction that they support a baseball team, and do not subsidize the occupants of a tourist attraction.

Quoting from Wikipedia,"Stockholm syndrome is an apparently paradoxical psychological phenomenon in which hostages express empathy and have positive feelings towards their captors, sometimes to the point of defending them." I've watched the North Side tribe from a distance for many years, and it seems they regard their attraction to that crumbling ballpark as an article of faith. It was Robert Pirsig in "Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance" who said, “When one person suffers from a delusion, it is called insanity. When many people suffer from a delusion it is called a Religion.”

I don't know if I've ever seen a better description of the Chicago National League enterprise.

WSI's
KW Appreciates The Game:
"Man, I really appreciate winning when we play in a Whiffle Ball park!"


submitted by tebman.

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Dayan Viciedo

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Totally Biased Game Recaps

September 28...A Royal Loss, but Hail to The King

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September 20... 2014 Is Mercifully Winding Down

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