Community  

 
 Message Boards  

 WSI Photo Gallery  

Post of the Week  

 Chat  

 

 

  2013 White Sox  

 Season Schedule  

 

2005 Championship

 

WSI Extras  

 WSI Interviews

  Audio Memories

  2002 Disaster!

2001 Season Fun!

2000 Champions!

Fun & Games

History & Glory

Sox Greats
Sox Quotables
Sox Fight Songs
Old Comiskey Park

     

   
WSI News - WSI Spotlight

WSI's FLYINGSOCK.COM.  Chicago White Sox coverage with totally biased attitude!

Eighty-Two Years and Waiting


The All-Schueler Team

by George Bova

The White Sox have announced that 1999 is a rebuilding year.  We would laugh if it didn't hurt so much.  This club has been rebuilding for most of this century.  Now were told to expect something better in the 21st one.  For Sox fans "rebuilding" is the worse sort of cliche.  Put it the same trash can with "Next Year is Our Year" and "Can't Miss Prospect".  Eighty-two years of this nonsense.

Yes, 1999 has already been written off.  Sox General Manager Ron Schueler has been magically transformed from the GM hired to get us to "Point C" (Reinsdorf's words, not ours) to the GM that will get us back to "Point A" (whatever the Hell that is).  We're all too familiar with how big a flop Schueler was in getting our team its long overdue championship.  Now we're suppose to believe he can develop young talent (pronounced "cheap talent") for our next Sox Dynasty (drummer's rim shot, cue laughter, "Hi-ooh!").

So we Sox fans are about to settle in for a season's worth of watching the last year's kids from Calgary, Birmingham, and exotic "A" ball ports-of-call try on their first ever major league pinstripes --- and hope beyond all belief that somewhere out there is a diamond of talent hidden in the rough of Comiskey Park.

What has Schueler ever gotten us that would now lead us to believe he can produce the championship result?  The All-Schueler Team is one of the scariest monstrosities to ever take the field in a major league ballpark.  Don't believe me?  Take a look at this hall of fame list of has-beens, half-talents, and wing and a prayer hopefuls.  Consider the ugly history of Ron Schueler's tenure as Sox GM and his worthiness to tackle his current assignment.

Some notorious Sox players of the Ron Schueler Era...

First Base - Wil Cordero
Sure, you could blame this acquisition on manager Jerry Manuel.  But Manuel has made it clear he wants to win --- yet Schueler hasn't run out to get any high-priced talent, has he?  A willing accomplice.

Second Base - Steve Sax
Schueler's first big mistake.  Acquired from the Yankees for three (!) pitchers and cash.  A complete bust most Sox fans have forgotten, probably for sanity's sake.

Third Base - Greg Norton
Well, at least we know he can't play first base.  With Ventura gone we'll now find out if he can't play third base, too.  Here's hoping "You're the Greatest" will prove better at his natural position.  Of course pitcher is Jaime Navarro's natural position, and look what happened there.

Shortstop - Mike Caruso
Could be a terrific shortstop and is certainly young enough to develop into an all-star.  But don't forget, Mike Caruso's biggest claim to fame is how he was acquired.  He is the first major league player ever traded at the expense of a stretch run at a championship.  Another Schueler first.

Outfield - Chris Sabo
One of Schueler's low cost reclamation projects you won't hear him bragging about.  A disgrace with the bat and in the field.  A distraction in the clubhouse, too.  He was Jaime Navarro before there was Jaime Navarro.

Outfield - Darren Lewis
We let Lance Johnson go for this dope?

Outfield -Mike Devereaux
Sucked before we got him, sucked while we had him, and has sucked ever since.  Any questions?

Catcher - Chad Krueter (twice)
Never underestimate how many times Ron Schueler will repeat his own mistake --- as long as its cheap and expedient.  (See also Jim Abbott).

Designated Hitter - Cory Snyder
Acquired by the Sox just months before he developed true softball league form.  What was Schueler thinking?

And who better to manage this collection of trash...

Manager - Terry Bevington
Better to keep your foot in your mouth than disgrace yourself further by uttering the next thought rattling inside your head --- a lesson never learned by Boomer.


George Bova is editor and founder of White Sox Interactive.  You can write George at george@whitesoxinteractive.com

More features from George Bova here!

Have a thought about
The All-Schueler Team?
You Can Put it on the Board -- Yes!



1 to 1 of 1

Search For:
Search in:
And in:
Any Words All Words

News Categories

Totally biased Sox news from White Sox Interactive!

EXCLUSIVE Sox features from WSI.

Full Sox coverage featuring the unique WSI slant!

The Totally Biased Game Recap, another WSI EXCLUSIVE!

YOUR chance to be featured at White Sox Interactive!

The funniest and most-noteworthy posts from the Sox Clubhouse message board.

The internet's largest FREE Sox news database, sorted by month.

The internet's largest FREE Sox news database, sorted by day.


WSI Spotlight

72 Sox Celebration Recap

72 Sox Where Are They Now

Ears and Appendices

Sox & the A-word

Part 2: Sox and the Media

Sox and the Media

A Second City Trophy

In Defense of Sox Hitting

Sox Quest

On the Brink

WSI News System Page Views: 23,033,542